J. Edgar

Directed by Clint Eastwood.

2011. Rated R, 137 minutes.

Cast:

Leonardo DiCaprio

Armie Hammer

Naomi Watts

Judi Dench

Josh Lucas

Lea Thompson

Christopher Shyer

Dermot Mulroney

Ken Howard

Geoff Pierson

Jeffrey Donovan

The life and times of the famed first director of the FBI, J. Edgar Hoover (DiCaprio). He’s reciting his memoirs to various bureau agents serving as typists. His recollections start in 1920, or thereabouts, a short while before he would get the job he literally kept for the rest of his life. He tells his story in grand fashion, sure to highlight the bureau’s successes along the way. Of course, he’s also sure to claim credit for them, whether deserved or not. If it were up to him, this movie would be an unabashed puff piece, a love letter to both the organization he loves and to himself.

Alas, it’s up to director Clint Eastwood. Since that’s the case, Hoover’s memories are spliced with flashbacks to things the lawman would likely never speak of. There are two main subjects explored. First is his blatantly Oedipal relationship with his mother, played by the always awesome Judi Dench. Second is the relationship he carried on with Clyde Tolson (Hammer), the man he hired to be the FBI’s assistant director despite dubious qualifications. The two are portrayed as having a friendship with a homosexual slant, if not a full blown romance. That’s because whether or not their interactions are strictly platonic or not is a murkier issue. If we are to believe the film, there is hand-holding and come-hither looks exchanged over the years, but nothing more.

Leonardo DiCaprio does an excellent job showing us a man who strains to repress his nature and masks his insecurities with a rigidly formal persona and shameless bullying of anyone he could, including the various Presidents of the United States he served under. This makes him a bellowing contradiction. He’s a man dedicated to bringing the nation’s criminals to justice yet totally unethical in his efforts to keep his job. He rabidly protects the sanctity of America yet seemed to detest freedom of speech. DiCaprio ably puts these complexities front and center.

Still, the performance isn’t quite what it could be. Part of this is no fault of the actor’s. The makeup betrays him and does the same even more egregiously to Hammer. Whenever either is shown as an old man, which is quite often, they look distractingly bad. The other night I caught a glimpse of what is perhaps Eddie Murphy’s last great comedy, Coming to America. In it, Murphy and buddy Arsenio Hall play something like a dozen characters between them. Even though the movie is over twenty years old, the makeup jobs still look good. In fact, they’re outstanding on several and very good on all but one, the lady in the nightclub that Hall plays. However, if you’ve seen it, you may agree it wasn’t supposed to look believable for that scene. Here, DiCaprio and Hammer are supposed to be believable. They’re supposed to represent the two men getting older. Sadly, they look deformed rather than aged. They are too plainly buried beneath pounds of immobile, seemingly hardened rubber that’s been glued to their faces. It’s hard to buy into the illusion we’re watching gentlemen in their twilight years when they look as if they’re struggling to move their lips beneath the weight of their prosthetics.

Another issue is that the movie seems to dislike its protagonist. Thankfully, this keeps it from being an exercise in hero worship. However, it may go too far in the other direction. The effect is it feels like it is less interested in informing us than it is in embarrassing Hoover. We’re never sure why even the people closest to him like him. It seems a miracle that only one person appears happy when he dies.

As biopics go, J. Edgar is a mixed bag. It wants to expose him, but is frustratingly vague about certain aspects of his life. Good things that he’s done, most notably a centralized finger printing system, are downplayed as mere strokes of his ego. The impact of all the advancements in law enforcement under his watch is hard to gauge. So is the stuff the movie seems to want to tell us. It’s entertaining in spots but never captivates us beyond how bad the characters look.

Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close

Directed by Stephen Daldry.

2011. Rated PG-13, 129 minutes.

Cast:

Thomas Horn

Tom Hanks

Sandra Bullock

Max von Sydow

Viola Davis

John Goodman

Jeffrey Wright

Zoe Caldwell

Oskar (Horn) is a happy little boy who does everything with his father Thomas (Hanks). Much of their time together is spent on fanciful excursions like looking for New York’s “lost sixth borough.” Dad uses these to bolster the boy’s confidence and develop his social skills since it seems the boy suffers from some form of autism (the movie half-heartedly kinda sorta rules out Asperger’s Syndrome). The two get along swimmingly. However, bliss is not eternal and Thomas dies during the tragic events of 9/11. A year later, he finds a key his father had hidden in a vase. Oskar then embarks on his own expedition all over the Big Apple to find out what it unlocks.

Though we hardly see her, Oskar does have a mother. She’s played by an appropriately worn looking Sandra Bullock. Nearly every word she says is laced with a defeatist attitude. Neither she nor her son are taking her husband’s death well. Basically, she lies in bed while he traverses the city trying to dig up remnants of his dad. Eventually he gets some company on his daily treks from the old guy known only as The Renter (von Sydow). The Renter doesn’t talk but rents a room from Oskar’s grandmother who lives across the street.

There are some interesting things going on in Extremely Loud. Oskar encounters some interesting people on his travels. The relationship between he and the old man is endearing. All thanks for this is due to the wonderful Max von Sydow. He expresses so much without ever uttering a sound. His is a remarkable piece of work. A couple other performances also shine in the brief time they’re allotted. I’ll not divulge any further details as this may give too large a hint about the outcome.

As we inch nearer that outcome things fall apart. The movie becomes too transparent in its attempts to manipulate. It tries to play on our inherent sympathy for children and soon has Oskar bursting into tears every so often in hopes that we’ll do the same. Some of us will. For the rest of us, however, Oskar’s proven to be kind of a jerk. We’ve humored him out of sympathy for his quest, but we’re not ready to sob with him. To combat this, we’re next hit with a seriously contrived and overly gooey conclusion that somehow excuses mom’s highly questionable parenting tactics. It’s clearly meant to have us bawling at the notion of sweetness and enveloped by the warmth of closure. Instead, I merely felt violated as it kept trying to touch my sensitive areas without permission.

MY SCORE: 5/10

Ranking the Batman Movies: #6

6. Batman: Gotham Knight

(2008)

Directed by Toshi Hiruma and Bruce Timm

Batman…Kevin Conroy

James Gordon…Jim Meskimen

Alfred…David McCallum

Lucius Fox…Kevin Michael Richardson

The Scarecrow/The Russian…Corey Burton

Sal Maroni…Rob Paulsen

And here is the most experimental Batman movie of all. To be honest, that’s probably the reason I like it so much. It’s a unique approach to the character that doesn’t undermine what we know of him, but expands our understanding. To achieve this we don’t follow a single narrative. Instead, there are six vignettes telling different stories involving our hero. They’re not officially part of the Nolan series, they seem to fit snugly in the space between Batman Begins and The Dark Knight, referencing events in the former quite often. This also looks different than anything else in the canon. Most of the animated flicks either try to look like the comics or one of the animated series. Gotham Knight does neither. It plays with different styles and color palettes. In a bold move, even Batman himself is rendered in a number of different ways. Understandably, this may be a bit too eclectic for a some folks but to me it’s a magnificent effort.

Happy Feet Two

Directed by George Miller.

2011. Rated PG, 100 minutes.

Cast:

Elijah Wood

Robin Williams

Pink

Benjamin Flores Jr.

Hugo Weaving

Brad Pitt

Matt Damon

Common

Sofia Vergara

Hank Azaria

John Goodman

Carlos Alazraqui

Ava Acres

Lombardo Boyar

Mumble (Wood), along with seemingly every penguin in the world finds themselves trapped when a giant hunk of ice blocks their path out of a frozen valley. Meanwhile, Will and Bill, a pair of krill played by Brad Pitt and Matt Damon, respectively, break loose from their school and venture out into the ocean on their own. Pop song medleys and dancing ensues.

As with its predecessor, the singing and dancing is the strength of the movie. The way songs most of would never think of in the same sentence blend seamlessly is brilliant. The numbers are lively and make time speed  by as we tap our own happy feet and maybe even sing along. That is, of course, as long as the thought of musicals aimed at children doesn’t automatically turn your stomach.

Where the first movie falters is in its sudden twist in tone. After two cheerful acts encouraging kids to be true to themselves, the third is an excruciatingly dark one involving man’s exploitation of animals for financial gain and destruction of the environment on top of our hero suffering spells of dementia. Even though we never get anywhere near those depths this time around, we’re only given one fun act before settling in for lots of penguins fretting about their pending doom and worshipping false idols. Sure, there are plenty of attempts at humor but most of them fall flat. To gauge this, I made sure to notice my children who weren’t laughing very often. The truth is the penguins and most of the other creatures fail to engage us unless they’re belting out a tune.

One exception, at least on a minor level, is Mumble’s son Erik (Ares). Like his dad, he’s a bit different than the other penguins. He doesn’t join in on any of the songs they sing. In fact, he doesn’t say much at all and spends as much time as possible hiding. As in almost every other movie ever made that features such an insecure character, this is all leading up to the moment he bursts out of his shell. The pleasant surprise is how effective a moment this is. It’s an absolute showstopper, by far my favorite part of the entire movie.

The rest of the film proceeds as it must, efficiently but not always joyfully. Everything happens right on time as we’ve been trained by countless other kiddie flicks. The climax is ridiculous, even for a cartoon about singing penguins. All of this would be forgivable if it didn’t commit a cardinal sin. There are large chunks of Happy Feet Two that are just plain boring.

MY SCORE: 5/10

Ranking the Batman Movies: #7

7. The Dark Knight Rises

(2012)

Directed by Christopher Nolan

Batman…Christian Bale

James Gordon…Gary Oldman

Alfred…Michael Caine

Lucius Fox…Morgan Freeman

John Blake…Joseph Gordon-Levitt

Catwoman…Anne Hathaway

Bane…Tom Hardy

The Scarecrow…Cillian Murphy

Miranda Tate…Marion Cotillard

The final chapter in Christopher Nolan’s Dark Knight trilogy is probably the most gorgeous Batman movie ever made. It’s arguably the darkest themed, also. A terrorist named Bane (Hardy) comes to Gotham and destroys the city from a socio-political standpoint while he simultaneously threatens to physically destroy it by detonating a nuke within the city limits. While we may shrink in our seats a little further each time our beloved Gotham, as well as Batman himself, takes another hit we can’t turn away. Christian Bale may have solidified his place as the best Batman of all time with his best performance in the role. The same goes for Michael Caine, easily the best Alfred there’s ever been. Anne Hathaway has also earned mighty praise for her work as Catwoman. The Dark Knight’s fights with Bane are insanely tense. Yes, there’s a lot of “best ever in a Batman movie” stuff going on. However, some narrative issues in Act 3 keep this from “rising” any further on the list.

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides

Directed by Rob Marshall.

2011. Rated PG-13, 136 minutes.

Cast:

Johnny Depp

Penélope Cruz

Geoffrey Rush

Ian McShane

Kevin McNally

Astrid Bergès-Frisbey

Stephen Graham

Keith Richards

Richard Griffiths

Sam Claflin

Ava Acres

Cpt. Jack Sparrow (Depp) is back for another adventure on the high seas. This time he is in search of the original fountain of youth. More accurately, he’s a reluctant guide for Blackbeard (McShane) and his daughter Angelica (Cruz) who need to find it for selfish reasons. Cpt. Barbossa (Rush) is hot on their tail. He wants to catch up with Blackbeard to settle an old score. Lots of swashbuckling, wisecracking and Cpt. Sparrow prancing about ensues.

As usual, Depp and his cast mates have a grand time hamming it up. Nearly every role is merely an excuse to mug for the camera. Our performers willingly dive over the top. The movie, even the entire franchise is better for it. Played straight this would likely be a dreadful affair. Played as it is, with a wink and a smile, allows both the viewer and the movie itself to revel in its absurdities. Like the best moments of the series: On Stranger Tides functions as much like a vaguely risqué comedy as it does an adventure film about pirates.

Wisely, this fourth installment in the “PotC” series sticks with a few easy to follow storylines. This is a welcome regression from the hyper-convoluted abyss that is At World’s End. While that movie is an incoherent jumble of parts, On Stranger Tides is a cohesive unit that moves forward at a brisk pace without leaving us behind. For some the entire franchise has lost its luster and will want nothing to do with this movie. For me, it’s a gleeful return to what we love about the PotC world. That said, I wouldn’t mind if they didn’t make any more of these. The time has come for Cpt. Sparrow to flitter away. This would be going out on a solid note.

MY SCORE: 6.5/10

Ranking the Batman Movies: #8

8. Batman: Mask of the Phantasm

(1993)

Directed by Eric Radomski and Bruce Timm

Batman…Kevin Conroy

James Gordon…Bob Hastings

Alfred…Efrem Zimbalist, Jr.

Andrea Beaumont…Dana Delaney

The Joker…Mark Hamill

The Phantasm…Stacey Keach

By now we realize that a generous portion of Gotham’s citizens have ties to organized crime. A mysterious masked and caped figure known as The Phantasm has started killing them off. Of course, Batman has to find out who this is and stop them if, for no other reason, he’s being blamed for the murders. We also get some flashbacks to our hero’s earliest days as a crime-fighter which also coincides with a very serious relationship with Andrea Beaumont. She’s just come back to town and stirs up all sorts of emotions in Bruce. This is probably the best handled love story among any of the features. You can see the twist coming a bit, but the rest of the movie is so enjoyable it doesn’t bother you. Many rank this as the best Batman animated feature and some would put it right at or near the top on this list. I’m not quite in that camp, but it’s quite good.