Morgan Freeman Week: Olympus Has Fallen

Morgan Freeman Week continues...

Directed by Antoine Fuqua.

2013. Rated R, 120 minutes.

Cast:

Gerard Butler

Aaron Eckhart

Morgan Freeman

Rick Yune

Angela Bassett

Dylan McDermott

Finley Jacobsen

Robert Forster

Melissa Leo

Radha Mitchell

Cole Hauser

Ashley Judd

When the limousine carrying President Benjamin Asher (Eckhart) and his wife (Judd) is involved in an accident Secret Service Agent Mike Banning (Butler) reacts immediately and saves the Commander-in-Chief's life. Unfortunately, he cannot rescue the First Lady. Even though the two men are friends, the president has Banning transferred to a desk job so that he doesn't have to be reminded of what happened whenever he sees his face. Fast forward eighteen months and President Asher and his son Connor (Jacobsen) appear to have adjusted as well as possible. Still, as presidents must, he's dealing with another crisis. This one involves meeting with the South Korean president to discuss how to keep their neighbors to the north at bay. If you guessed that the North Koreans crash this little party with guns blazing, give yourself a cookie. No extra points for guessing they put a pretty good hurtin' on our nation's capital, White House included. The Prez is taken to his bunker, but yeah, there are bad guys there, too. Okay, you only get one shot at this one. Guess who is the only person who can save the day? So yeah, Agent Banning spots all the mayhem from his office window and springs into action.

Typical of just about every movie where a foreign entity invades the U.S., we get an exercise in flag waving. We also get an oversimplification of our place in the world, at least from our point of view. It's all America good, everyone else evil, or weak. With this comes hokey dialogue, faceless villains from whatever country we think is most dangerous to us when the film is made, and lots of hand-wringing over what our heroes' next move should be. Anyone expecting anything more is setting themselves up for disappointment.

Even with expectations properly set, there are some less than exemplary aspects to Olympus Has Fallen. For starters, Pres. Asher comes across as less brave than his subordinates and explicitly goes against the only policy the movie bothers to mention: The United States will not negotiate with terrorists. Part of the plot is the North Koreans trying to gain access to a system that will effectively shut down all of America's nukes. To do this they need three codes which three separate people, all in the bunker, including the president, have one each. When the others are pressed a bit, he immediately caves and implores them to give up the goods. What the movie wants us to think is that he's saving the lives of those with him and is even willing to sacrifice himself. This is why he says to both, when he tells them to spill the beans, "They'll never get mine!" In reality, he's giving up our nation's security without much of a fight even though it's painfully obvious the bad guys can't just kill these people and accomplish their objectives.

Another issue is that our villains willfully put themselves in position to be defeated. We're told, without qualification, that no one can get into the president's bunker. As I mentioned, every person the North Koreans need is already in there with them. Everything they want is at their fingertips. Why keep talking to those who have assumed power in the president's absence? By the way, that person is Morgan Freeman and Speaker-of-the-House Trumbull. More tactically important, why send anyone out, or open the door for any reason until the mission is complete? If I'm the bad guys, whatever Banning is doing outside is largely irrelevant. I've got whatever need in the bunker with me and he can't get to me. Of course, that would make this a far different movie, so I understand why it was done. It just makes them look stupid, and in turn, the movie looks this way, too.

Without some idiocy by the villains, the movie wouldn't have as much of what it does best: action. There is plenty of it. During it, star Gerard Butler kicks all sorts of ass. In other words, people looking for a shoot 'em up get what they came for. It's all well done with lots of casualties on both sides. This keeps the movie entertaining even if it is eye-roll worthy. Things speed by pretty quickly as they go boom left and right. Yup, Washington DC is torn up good. All in all, it's similar to the recent remake of Red Dawn. That doesn't even take into account the apparent similarities it has to a movie I haven't even seen yet, but will soon, White House Down. OHF has loads of chest thumping patriotism, explosions, gunfights, and problems with its plot.

MY SCORE: 5/10

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The Man with the Iron Fists

Directed by RZA.

2012. Rated R, 95 minutes.

Cast:

RZA

Russell Crowe

Lucy Liu

Rick Yune

Jamie Chung

Dave Bautista

Cung Le

Byron Mann

Daniel Wu

Zhu Zhu

Pam Grier

Gordon Liu

Andrew Ng

Zen Yi (Yune) is away getting married when he gets word that his father has been killed. Right away, he decides to head home to Jungle Village and exact his revenge against the Lion clan. Ah yes, the most tried and true plot of martial arts flicks. Englishman Jack Knife (Crowe) is in the area in hopes of finding gold. All of the warring clans get their rather heinous weapons from the local blacksmith known only as...um…Blacksmith (RZA). Okay, fine. Whether it’s time for lovin’ or fightin’ everyone congregates at the local house of ill repute run by Madam Blossom (Liu). Bad narration, cheesy dialogue and gory martial arts goodness ensues.

If you know anything about the brains behind this operation, it makes perfect sense for this movie to turn out precisely as it does. The Man with the Iron Fists formed in the mind of its writer and director the RZA (pronounced Riz-uh for the uninitiated). He’s also one of the people most responsible for giving us one of the greatest groups in hip hop history, The Wu-Tang Clan. They built a mythology surrounding themselves in which 70s and 80s martial arts movies play a huge role influencing both the music they created and philosophies they espoused. This movie is nothing short of an unabashed homage to those films. Though RZA struggles in his acting role, as director he gives us a visual treat chock full of Shaw Brothers inspired madness.

Another major influence is the work of producer Quentin Tarantino’s Kill Bill, for which the RZA provided the score along with QT pals Robert Rodriguez and Eli Roth. As a result “…Iron Fists” achieves a look and tongue-in-cheek feel of movies by all three. It lacks the depth and quality of their work but its apparent reverence for the genre that inspired it at least puts it in the same vein. Roth was even brought in as a co-writer on the screenplay. He’s been credited mostly with chopping the movie down from a four hour, two part behemoth down to its fighting weight of just over 90 minutes. Thank goodness.

Russell Crowe and Lucy Liu seem to be having great fun hamming it up. Crowe does everything except twirl his moustache between his index finger and thumb. Meanwhile, Liu revisits her Kill Bill days. Big, bad wrestler Bautista effectively stomps around the set knocking over things and people alike while grunting his lines. His character is heavily influenced by both Toad from the genre classic Five Deadly Venoms and Colossal of the X-Men. This is a perfect blend of old school kung fu flick and comic book sensibilities. This lends authenticity to the hokeyness that is Iron Fists. It would have been perfectly at home in either of the two places where the RZA saw most of those martial arts pictures during his formative years, either in a grindhouse theater on Manhattan’s 42nd Street or at 3 o’clock every Saturday afternoon on Channel 5 (WNEW, back then). At least, that’s where me and all my friends saw them. The plots were always simple, the acting and dialogue was almost always bad and the fighting was always exhilarating.

If you go into …Iron Fists expecting anything other than a zany kung fu flick you’ll be sorely disappointed. A sharply written plot and Oscar-worthy performances are not found her. To be honest, don’t even expect it all to make sense within its own context. Things get convoluted, at times. All of these together normally add up to a very bad movie. However, the blood splattering action makes it a package just too cheesy to resist. If you’re like me, a heavy nostalgia takes over. Before you know it, you’re having a grand time watching a rotten movie. That’s right, it’s so bad it’s awesome!

MY SCORE: -10/10

Ninja Assassin

Directed by James McTeigue.
2009. Rated R, 99 minutes.
Cast:
Rain
Naomie Harris
Ben Miles
Rick Yune
Shô Kosugi
Anna Sawai
Joon Lee

Raizo, played by the singularly and mystically named Rain, has turned his back on his family. His family is not like yours. They are the infamous Ozunu clan. The Ozunu clan is one of the infamous “nine clans” that has apparently been supplying ninjas to work as assassins for governments or “anyone who has gold” for thousands of years. They are, of course, led by Ozunu (Kosugi). How old is this guy? Shouldn’t he be Ozunu XXV or something? Alas, that’s not important.

When we meet Raizo, he is roughly 9 or 10 years old and under the tutelage of Ozunu, along with about a couple dozen other kids of about the same age. A few of them are girls. How did Ozunu become the sole guardian of all these children? That’s not important, either. What is important is that it’s a secret ninja training compound. It’s so secret, Ozunu seems to run the place with absolute autonomy. There doesn’t even appear to be any staff to help run the place. You guessed it, that’s not important.

What is sorta important is that Raizo flew the coup and his family is out to kill him for it. They are also out to kill Mika (Harris), the Europol agent who has picked up their scent and wants to put a stop to all this ninja madness.

What is really important is that everything you’ve read so far gives a great excuse for some nasty, nasty ninja fights. All manner of sharp, shiny metallic weaponry whirls about while the people using them do the same. Losers in these fights generally end up as a group of parts on the floor in a puddle of blood. One rather unlucky young lady ends up in a dryer. Speaking of blood, it’s obviously cgi, but it splatters everywhere. Even I ended up with a few red stains on my shirt.

The dialogue that drives this vehicle is hokey, at best. Lots of things make little or no sense. For instance, when you watch it please tell me where you think Ozunu’s compound is located based on how things play out. Why the hell would he have it there? Did it move, or is it me? Wait a minute…that’s not important. It is important that we move very quickly from one genuinely fun action sequence to the next. Oh, and a still breathing ninja has no need for Neosporin, band-aids or even stitches. It all adds up to a movie that’s so bad, it’s awesome!

The Opposite View: Movies so bad they're awesome are exempt.

What the Internet Says: 6.4/10 on imdb.com (6/27/10), 25% on rottentomatoes.com, 34/100 on metacritic.com


MY SCORE: -10/10