Pick-Up

Directed by Bernard Hirschenson.
1975. Rated R, 80 minutes.
Cast:
Jill Senter
Gini Eastwood
Alan Long
Tom Quinn
Bess Douglass
John Winter
Don Penny

When our story begins we get a closeup of some guy’s face as he takes a leak on the side of a bus. Umm…okaaay. Not too far off the side of the road, a couple of young ladies are sitting amongst the weeds watching the action. The blonde makes googly eyes at him, immediately convincing him to give these two random babes a lift wherever they want to go. She can’t get there fast enough, but the brunette is hesitant. You see, the brunette is an Aries. Apparently, all people born under that sign have psychic abilities. At least, that’s what she says. Anyhoo, her spider sense or something kicks in and with a rather blank look on her face that we’ll become far too familiar with, she says “It’s gonna be a bad trip.” Little did I know at this point, she is talking about our experience watching this crap. Thinking she means something bad, possibly gruesome and hopefully interesting is about to happen, I keep watching.

Once on board, we find out the bus is actually a 1970s style mobile home. It looks pretty spiffy on the inside. This thing must’ve eaten up a large chunk of the budget, but I digress. The brunette continues to be sour puss and has numerous flashbacks to her painful childhood, during which she appears fully grown, by the way. This must be contagious because eventually, the other two start having flashbacks, too. No to be outdone by a couple of non-Aries, the brunette also has all sorts of strange visions (hallucinations?). She conjures up a random Black woman dressed in an all-white flowing robe whispering very loudly in her best ominous voice. There is also the even more random and bizarre clown that chases her through the woods. Finally, there’s an even-more-random-than-the-clown concrete slab in the middle of said woods. The brunette wanders upon that, wearing only the robe she must have borrowed from the Black woman. She quickly strips that off and psychicly pleasures herself. What? You think I’m kidding? I wish.

Speaking of getting naked, that’s what the other two knuckleheads do best. Well, they have a lot of sex, too. They go for walks, take off their clothes, frolic in the grass, or water, ride a swing together and do the wild thing. They also laugh the whole time, unless they’re kissing or on those less than thrilling occasions one of their brains forms a sentence and forces them to speak. However, just so you don’t go thinking the blonde is having all the fun, or doubt our guy’s studliness, the brunette eventually comes around and he screws her, too. In fact, that’s the turning point of our movie. It precedes a very strange ending that makes about as much sense as inviting Hitler to a bar mitzvah.

The sad part is while we’re watching this, we get the sense the director is striving to create something deep, meaningful and artistically sexy. Unfortunately, we can also tell he doesn’t have anything even remotely resembling the ability to turn that particular trick. Just making it coherent is a task he fails miserably. What he’s given us is soft-core porn at its very weirdest.

MY SCORE: 0/10

The Girl Who Played With Fire

Directed by Daniel Alfredson.
2009. Rated R, 129 minutes, Swedish.
Cast:
Noomi Rapace
Michael Nyqvist
Lena Endre
Sofia Ledarp
Georgi Staykov
Peter Andersson
Michalis Koutsogiannakis
Hans Christian Thulin
Yasmine Garbi

After the unbelievable adventure that was The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, Lisbeth Salander (Rapace) understandably needed some time away. She took a year to do some traveling and, presumably, get a little R & R. Upon her return home, she visits some old friends and starts to take care of some unfinished business. This means going to see her probation officer and making sure he keeps up his end of the bargain they painfully came to agree upon in the first movie. However, when he turns up dead, along with a young journalist and his criminologist wife, Lisbeth becomes the top suspect in all three murders. They are all killed by the probation officer’sgun which has her fingerprints on them. Lisbeth trying to clear her name ensues.

Her biggest ally is the one friend she can’t bring herself to actually go see, Mikael Blomkvist (Nyqvist). The two worked closely together, even became lovers during the first movie. Here, he aids her from afar. Though she keeps her distance, he’s still supremely confident in her innocence.

For the genre of movie it finds itself in, it’s a very solid entry. It’s well written, moves at a brisk pace and gives us intriguing enough villains to root against. Lisbeth continues to be an amazing character, hellbent on living by her own rules. Where Fire suffers is in comparison to its predecessor. Dragon Tattoo is electrifying because it takes an unflinching look at the rawness of its characters and the situations they’re in. It leaves almost nothing to your insinuations and uses the camera’s trained eye to create empathy while resorting to normal movie manipulations as little as possible.

This time around, everything feels much more conventional. The plot machinations are more easily visible and feel culled from standardized Hollywood protocol. So too, do the revelations that pop up along the way. There’s little surprise here. In fact, at the risk of spoiling things, it’s almost like much of Star Wars lore has been adapted to this set of characters in present day Stockholm.

With all of that said, it is still a solid, if unspectacular, sequel. A good movie in its own right, it only loses points because fo the greatness of the original. I still recommend seeing it if, for no other reason than being thrust back into the world of Lisbeth Salander. It’s a dark, seedy place filled with the smoke from her constantly lit cigarette. Rapace gives another marvelous performance in the lead role. She alone is enough to keep us anxiously waiting the completion of this trilogy with The Girl Who Kicked the Hornets Nest.

MY SCORE: 7/10

Requiem for a Heavyweight

Directed by Ralph Nelson
1962. Not Rated, 95 minutes.
Cast:
Anthony Quinn
Jackie Gleason
Mickey Rooney
Julie Harris
Stanley Adams
Val Avery
Herbie Faye
Muhammad Ali
Jack Dempsey

After 17 years in the ring and 111 fights, Mountain Rivera (Quinn) is a shot fighter. In his last fight, he takes a beating at the hands of one Cassius Clay, a very young Muhammad Ali playing himself even before his famous name-change. Rivera is left with damage to his left eye. It is enough that the doctor present at the arena tells his manager he won’t allow Mountain to fight ever again. His speech has become permanently slurred from all the pounding his head has taken. With that, almost no formal education and no skill beyond boxing, Rivera has to try to find his way in normal society.

Rivera’s manager, Maish (Gleason) is in deep to a bookie after a startling bet doesn’t pan out. Since his mule can no longer work, his mad quest to come up with the money he owes, and just what he owes it for, hangs over the proceedings.

Owing is a huge factor in everything that goes on. Just who owes who is the cause of much debate and the reason for many of the actions taken. When the film ends, the scale has been tilted to one side, but we’re saddened by the way in which this comes about. It’s odd that the person we come to hate the most gets a sort of come-uppance, yet we’re still not happy.

The movie weaves its way up to that amazing conclusion through a tapestry of great writing and outstanding performances. Strangely enough, it’s written by Rod Serling. To people of my age and older, that name is forever linked to The Twilight Zone, not hard-hitting human drama. At only 95 minutes, Requiem for a Heavyweight is wound tight as a drum, yet still lets us know these people intimately. We know what drives them, what scares them and what repels them. We have strong feelings about each of our four principals.

Our strongest feelings are reserved for Mountain. It seems his whole life has been spent being used to get what other people want. Even at this stage, he’s torn between two people who want very different things for and from him. What does he want for himself? That’s hard to say. Other than know what he doesn’t want, he seems to lack original thought. To pull this off, Anthony Quinn gives one of the best performances I’ve ever seen. His work here is pretty clearly a major inspiration for the way Sylvester Stallone would portray Rocky Balboa fourteen years later.

Much to their credit, Quinn’s supporting cast is never overshadowed. They, themselves, turn in powerful portrayals. Mickey Rooney (Army) is our mouthpiece. He says what we’re thinking with blunt honesty. Julie Harris (Ms. Miller) is Mountain’s possibly bright future, full of happiness and love. Then there’s Maish, played by the incomparable Jackie Gleason. I’ll just say he’s as brilliant as he always is and leave it at that.

The passage of time has given RfaH great irony. The easiest to spot is the cameo of Muhammad Ali, then known as Cassius Clay. He’s since become Mountain Rivera, in a physical sense. He was once so verbose and articulate that even in a post-ESPN, soundbite driven world his rantings and spontaneous verse remain among the most famous quotes in sports history. Yet, who really knows how many too many fights have robbed him and us of his vibrance, rendered him seemingly less than a shell of his former self. Luckily for Ali his legacy sustains him, both financially and in our mind’s eye. We’ll never forget him floating like a butterfly and stinging like a bee.

Mountain Rivera has no such luxuries. The game of boxing that he loves so much has robbed him of many possibilities outside the ring and keeps taking from him. How many boxers over the years have suffered the same fate? Many of them aren’t even as lucky as Rivera. He’s enjoyed a measure of success most never do. As he would proudly tell you, in 1952 they ranked him number five in the world.

Another fairly obvious irony is the fact that it’s a boxing movie with almost no boxing. It all takes place in the first few minutes. A greater irony is how this mirrors the entire sport today. There is much talk of boxing’s demise and very little actual boxing, at least on the biggest stages. Boxing’s speech is slurred, it’s movements no longer sharp as MMA has it on the ropes poised to deliver a knockout blow. It’s fighting for its survival, trying to make its way in a ready to move on without it, much like Mountain Rivera.

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Splinterheads

Directed by Barnt Sersen.
2009. Rated R, 94 minutes.
Cast:
Thomas Middleditch
Rachael Taylor
Christopher McDonald
Lea Thompson
Dean Winters
Jason Rogel
Edmund Lyndeck
Pamela Shaw
Frankie Faison
Jason Mantzoukas
Lennon Parham

Justin (Middleditch) is a bit of a loser and a lot of a slacker. He’s grown but lives at home with mom and works for his best friend as a lawn mower. When an attractive girl hustles him for sixty bucks he still takes a shine to her. Well, I did say she’s attractive, right? When she hustles him a second time at the carnival where she works, he falls flat out in love with her. Okay, having a thing for her after she gets over on you once, I can see. Twice? She just isn’t that dang hot. Oh well, such is the way with lonely boys when a real live female that’s not related to them pays them the least bit of attention, I guess.

The girl’s name is Galaxy (Taylor). In case you were wondering, that’s the first clue this is a quirky indy comedy. I think her name is supposed to symbolize the enormity of her presence in Justin’s world, or something. It really just feels like her parent did a lot of drugs.

Anyhoo, to shorten this up a bit, the carnival Galaxy works at is a traveling one, in town for a couple weeks. She has a nasty, tough guy boyfriend named Reggie (Winters) that even she doesn’t like, but is obviously scared to death of. There’s also Bruce (McDonald). He seems to be the only cop in town and is still smarting from his breakup with Justin’s mom (Thompson). Add in the horny aunt (Shaw), the terrible carny magician known as the Amazing Steve (Mantzoukas), his assistant/girlfriend Wyoming (Parham) and Justin’s bestest buddy, Wayne (Rogel) and you have the whole dag-nabbit crew. In case you were wondering, though I don’t know why you would be, Wayne is of Asian descent and his full name is Wayne Chung. Someone who is too clever by half did this so they would have an excuse to use the song Everybody Have Fun Tonight by the group Wang Chung. Whatever.

Oh, I almost forgot the best character. That would be Justin’s 116 year old grandfather Albert (Lyndeck). Through a fortunately unfortunate event, he’s just become the world’s oldest living man. His scenes are consistently among the best.

As for the rest of the movie, it tries real hard. It efforts mightily for our laughs, but rarely earns them. It never gels into a cohesive piece of work. It’s also rather cliché despite all its surface quirkiness. Even worse, since much of it takes place at the carnival, it can’t avoid comparisons to the far superior Adventureland. In fact, I suggest you see Adventureland, instead.

MY SCORE: 4.5/10

Inception

Directed by Christopher Nolan.
2010. Rated PG-13, 148 minutes.
Cast:
Leonardo DiCaprio
Joseph Gordon-Levitt
Ellen Page
Ken Watanabe
Tom Hardy
Marion Cotillard
Cillian Murphy
Dileep Rao
Tom Berenger
Michael Caine

Dom Cobb (DiCaprio) is a unique sort of criminal. He’s often hired by companies to steal secrets from their competitors. What makes him uniqe is that he actually enters a person’s mind through their dreams to unlock these treasures. His latest employer, Mr. Saito (Watanabe), wants something different. Mr. Saito wants him to do the opposite and plant an idea in the mind of his biggest competitor’s son Robert Fischer (Murphy). Putting an idea into someone’s mind, we learn, is called “inception” and thought by most to be impossible. Cobb says he can deliver and sets out hiring a crack staff to help him do so.

At any given moment we are thrust into and kicked out of dreams. We watch land and cityscapes change before our eyes, often in impossible ways. We see how time operates on different levels of consciousness. We see Dom’s own sanity slipping as too much time spent in other people’s minds, along with the things going on in his own, take a steadily increasing toll on him and threatens his and the team’s ability to complete the mission.

This is far from a simple movie. Like many fantasy or science-fiction films, it asks us to accept something seemingly preposterous as a sort of reality. The difference between Inception and the majority of others is simple. For the two hours or so we’re watching those others, it’s mutually understood that the reality on screen is wholly separate from our own. We know that no amount of exposure to gamma rays is going to transform us into The Hulk. Here, we’re given cause to wonder about our own dreams and the odd events that occur during the portions we can remember. And what about those parts we can’t remember?

Amazingly, even with all the jumping in and out of dreams and playing with reality, Inception is not nearly as convoluted or complicated as it could’ve been. Like I said, though, nor is it simple. With incredible special fx, astute storytelling, enough action infused into the proceedings and another great performance by DiCaprio, it strikes a perfect balance between entertaining us and challenging us.

Speaking of DiCaprio, he’s becoming the go-to-guy for leading men with less than a firm grip of reality. Here, as well as in The Departed and most recently in Shutter Island, he plays a guy who struggles with the concept. Kudos to him for being brilliant in all three.

As I’ve mentioned, the special fx are also brilliant. Worlds coming together and falling apart as we watch provide splendid visuals. In particular, the city that folds over on itself is an awe-inspiring moment. My only gripe is that I didn’t see it on the big screen. I may not ever get to see it in a theater, but I definitely plan on seeing it on something bigger than my 32” television. Yes, I’m putting my pennies aside.

All of the great things Inception does would be for naught if it blew the ending. Thankfully, it does nothing of the sort. Surprisingly, it leaves us right where it tells us it will and somehow, it still works. It works because we hope against hope that that’s not how it will end. Still, when it does we’re left to wonder and debate what’s next. It’s a perfect ending that I hope isn’t ruined by a sequel.

MY SCORE: 10/10

Favorite Boxing Movies

This weekend, one of the most hyped sports movies in recent memory has been released. That movie is The Fighter, starring Mark Wahlberg as former welterweight champ Mickey Ward. Though I haven’t seen it yet, I am anxious to. To me, boxing movies reign supreme in the genre of sports films. It seems that the folks who give out awards agree with me. The only two sports movies to ever win the Oscar for Best Picture were both about boxing. Don’t worry, I’ll name them as I get to them.

Truth told, none of these movies are truly about boxing. They’re about the triumphs and tragedies of an individual. They’re about one person trying to pull themselves up by their bootstraps which earns our vested interest in whether they succeed or fail. They’re about winning and losing, both in the ring and in life.

I haven’t seen every boxing movie. In fact, while researching this topic I found there are a great number of them I’ve missed. Therefore, this is not a comprehensive “Greatest” list, it’s a “Favorites” list. As in, of the dozens I’ve seen these are my favorites. Oh, and why 12 instead of the normal 10? When I was growing up, championship fights lasted 15 rounds. In an effort to make the sport safer that number was reduced to 12. Initially, I was going to do 15, here. However, in the interest of your safety I’ve limited myself to…

My 12 Favorite Boxing Movies
(Quick Key:
The Key
Promoter = the director
Fighter = the person starring as the boxer
Weight Class = Fighting weight class of the boxer)

12. The Hurricane (1999)
Fighter: Denzel Washington
Weight Class: Middleweight
Promoter: Norman Jewison[/size][/color]
Based on the life and times on middleweight contender Rubin “Hurricane” Carter, who was wrongly convicted of murder and the subsequent fight to prove his innocence. In the title role, Denzel Washington gives a fantastic performance that elevates the movie past other contenders. However, as good as he is, take away a point for him being much bigger than any middleweight.

11. Tyson (2008)
Fighter: Mike Tyson
Weight Class: Heavyweight
Promoter: James Toback
Former Heavyweight champion of the world, Mike Tyson basically psychoanalyzes himself. He displays the intelligence he’s hardly given credit for possessing. He also has some his own version of the truth and his sanity is very much in question. It’s hardly a traditional boxing movie but an intriguing watch, nonetheless.

10. Ali (2001)
Fighter: Will Smith
Weight Class: Heavyweight
Promoter: Michael Mann
Instead of trying to chronicle Muhammad Ali’s entire life, this focuses on the period between 1964 and 1974, culminating with his historic fight in Zaire against then unbeaten and menacing champ George Foreman. It’s probably the most underappreciated movie on the list. Audiences and critics alike were rather apathetic towards it. Still, Will Smith’s powerful portrayal of “The Greatest” garnered him an Oscar nomination for Best Actor.

9. Rocky II (1979)
Fighter: Sylvester Stallone
Weight Class: Heavyweight
Promoter: Sylvester Stallone
Somehow, people conveniently forget that in the original Rocky our hero didn’t actually win the big fight. This is the movie where Rocky actually turned the trick. When he finally does, we let out two movies worth of exhilaration. Thus, some have proclaimed this to be the best in the series. I disagree, but it’s a pretty clear cut second as the series took a sharp turn in tone and slathered on the cheese even heavier starting with Rocky III.

8. Cinderella Man (2005)
Fighter: Russell Crowe
Weight Class: Heavyweight
Promoter: Ron Howard
Here, we get a biopic on Heavyweight champ James J. Braddock. More than anything we watch him try to hold his family together through the Great Depression. Bills piled up and money stopped coming in, but through it all our champ remained a gentleman. Russell Crowe is as compelling as always. The only real knock is Braddock seemed a little too perfect. Still, it works.

7. Let’s Do it Again (1975)
Fighter: Jimmy Walker
Weight Class: Middleweight
Promoter: Sidney Poitier
This is the most unique movie on the list. It’s the only comedy and the fighter has little to do with our enjoyment of the film. That fighter is super scrawny Bootney Farnsworth played by Jimmy Walker, better known as J. J. from Good Times. It’s really about a couple guys pulling a con on a pair of gangsters to raise funds for their lodge. Those two guys are played brilliantly by the one of the 1970s greatest comedic duos, Bill Cosby and Sidney Poitier. As for our champ, well, let’s just say the power of positive thinking is taken to new heights. Hip Hop culture owes this movie a debt, as well. One of the gangsters is named Biggie Smalls, the original and still more popular moniker the late MC, The Notorious B.I.G.

6. Unforgivable Blackness: The Rise and Fall of Jack Johnson (2004)
Fighter: Jack Johnson
Weight Class: Heavyweight
Promoter: Ken Burns
Ken Burns’ epic documentary on the first Black Heavyweight champion of the world, Jack Johnson, is a sprawling, enthralling masterpiece. It’s the only movie here that might not qualify as such. It originally aired in two parts on separate nights on PBS and totals about four hours making it a made-for-TV flick, at best. That’s okay. Quality transcends medium. Through Johnson, we get a palpable sense of the political and racial climate of the late 19th and early 20th century and we get to see a man who, for the most part, embodied a song Frank Sinatra would make decades later: “I Did it My Way”.

5. Million Dollar Baby (2004)
Fighter: Hilary Swank
Weight Class: Welterweight
Promoter: Clint Eastwood
One day, a fighter walks into Frank’s gym asking to be trained by him in hopes of one day winning a title. First off, the fighter’s already 31 years old. The bigger problem: the fighter is a woman. Frank refuses, but she keeps coming back until he relents. From there, we get a fantastic boxing movie. Along with Swank as our champ, Maggie, and Clint bringing his usual gruffness to his role as Frank, we get a great supporting turn from Morgan Freeman. In case you’ve forgotten, this is one of only two sports movies to ever win an Oscar for Best Picture. It’s only movie featuring a female to make this list.

4. When We Were Kings (1996)
Fighter: Muhammad Ali
Weight Class: Heavyweight
Promoter: Leon Gast
Back when he was young enough to do so, Muhammad Ali played himself in the autobiographic film The Greatest. It’s a solid movie in its own right that culminates with the champs win over George Foreman. Years later, Will Smith would play Ali in the movie of the same title and earn an Oscar nod for doing so. That movie also ended after the Foreman fight. Between the two is this documentary that takes us much deeper inside the making of that legendary fight. We see Ali realize that he is, and comfortably step into the role of an international figure. Meanwhile, Foreman struggles with having the cloak of a villain practically forced upon him. It’s a spectacular piece of work.

3. Requiem for a Heavyweight (1964)
Fighter: Anthony Quinn
Weight Class: Heavyweight
Promoter: Ralph Nelson
After taking a beating at the hands of Cassius Clay, a young Ali playing himself in a cameo (he’s all over this list), Mountain Rivera finds out that was his last fight. Damage to his eye has caused the doctor in attendance to forbid him to fight any longer. He’s been a fighter for 17 years, that’s all he knows. We watch him struggle to make his way in the world while the people close to him tug him in different directions. It’s a heart-breaking picture that’s just perfect all the way through, including the wonderful performance of Anthony Quinn as Mountain.

2. Rocky (1976)
Fighter: Sylvester Stallone
Weight Class: Heavyweight
Promoter: John G. Avildsen
This is where we first meet and fall in love with Rocky Balboa. At this point, he’s not even a has-been, he’s a never-was fighter trying to make ends meet on the mean streets in Philly. He lucks into a shot at the heavyweight title when the guy scheduled to fight the champ breaks his hand. From there, we get arguably the most imitated movie in history. Hundreds, if not thousands of movies have followed its template and not all of them are sports movie. For creating something so iconic, Sylvester Stallone never gets enough credit. After so many sequels and so many other not nearly as thoughtful movies, we forget that Stallone didn’t just play Rocky, he created the character and wrote the screenplay. Oh yeah, this was the first sports movie to take home the Oscar for Best Picture.

1. Raging Bull (1980)
Fighter: Jake La Motta
Weight Class: Middleweight
Promoter: Martin Scorcese
Former middleweight champ Jake La Motta has far more in common with Mike Tyson than Rocky. He pretty much defines “self-destructive.” He’s also destructive to those around him, too. He views them all like they’re his opponents, wary of every move they make, fearing they’re trying to land the knock out blow. He treats them as such and it costs him big. Here is a brutal movie about a brutal man in a brutal sport. To bring Jake to life, Robert De Niro gives what might be the best performance of his career. This didn’t win Best Picture, but it should’ve in my opinion. C’mon Academy! Ordinary People? For my money, this is the best sports movie ever made.

Other Contenders:

The Great White Hope (1970)

The Champ (1979)

Rocky IV (1985)

The Great White Hype (1996)

Resurrecting the Champ (2007)

Facing Ali (2009)