Monday, September 20, 2010

Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore

Directed by Brad Peyton.
2010. Rated PG, 82 minutes.
James Marsden
Christina Applegate
Bette Midler
Katt Williams
Nick Nolte
Neil Patrick Harris
Sean Hayes
Chris O’Donnell
Roger Moore

Kitty Galore (Midler) is a super-villainous cat that is trying to take over the world. It’s up to the agents of a secret dogs-only CIA-type organization to stop her. James Bond influenced, CGI enhanced cat versus canine hijinks and shenanigans ensue.

Along the way, our heroes make alliances with a cat and a pigeon while generally unfunny stuff happens. On the flipside, even more unfunny stuff happens as we watch Kitty try to spring her evil plan into action while also dealing with her owner who is a bumbling, incompetent magician.

Don’t get me wrong, there is the occasional chuckle to be had. Many of them belong to the pigeon, voiced by Katt Williams. Hmm, how ironic is it that in a movie about cats against dogs, the bird is played by a person named Katt? Nevermind. I feel a tangent coming on. This movie isn’t worthy of a tangent.

To try and force a few more laughs, parents are treated to…subjected to a neverending stream of references to other, better movies. There’s lots of James Bond, some Lethal Weapon, Men in Black and countless others, including a huge Silence of the Lambs parody that can be spotted from miles and miles away for anyone who’s seen the horror classic. And it’s not funny. Yeah, during the 82 minute runtime I’m pretty sure I rolled my eyes at least 82 times.

Story-wise, it just lurches forward with the obvious message about overlooking our differences, joining forces and working together to overlook our differences. No, that’s not a typo. It gets to the point where it’s unbearable. Kids might love it, but many adults will be fighting the urge to take a nap. Remember G-Force? Yup, it’s like that. By the way, if you’re wondering why I haven’t mentioned the original, assuming you even knew this was a sequel, it’s because aside from that whole Silence of the Lambes, this has absolutely nothing to do with the first movie. I actually like that movie. This one, they could’ve kept.

To be fair, it is a 3D movie, but I saw it in plain ol’ 2D. Maybe, it would’ve been better in 3D. Nah, because then all the suckiness would be leaping off the screen at me.

The Opposite View: Billy Heller, New York Post

What the Internet Says: 2.4/10 on (2.4/10 on, 96th worst of all time as of 9/20/10), 13% on, 30/100 on

MY SCORE: 2/10

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