Mt. Rushmore of Movies '19

So here’s what happened. My dude, my homie, my main shit stain, Mario from Two Dollar Cinema, throws up an announcement for his (kinda-sorta, but not really) annual Mt. Rushmore blogathon. This is when he asks fellow bloggers to give us a Mt. Rushmore (read: top four or favorite four) of anything cinematic. Of course, I immediately said I’m in, told myself I had time, I mean the deadline was a couple weeks away, so I did not get on it right away. A couple days went by and I was like, okay, I still got this. I just need to think of something to do. I swear, five, maybe six minutes went by, and I started noticing tweets about it posts for it. And the due date was like…RIGHT NOW!

And I still hadn’t thought of anything to do.

Even worse, it fell on a workday. The problem there is not the day itself, but the night before. I’m a teacher and I send home weekly correspondence to parents of Friday – the day in question. That meant a long night of putting together folders filled with all the work my kids have been doing all week. By the time I got through with that, it was impossible to keep my eyes open long enough for anything fun. I trudged off to bed, shed a few tears of disappointment into my pillow before drifting off for a guilt-ridden few hours.

I let Mario down.

And it’s all because I ran out of time. That finally gave me an idea for a topic. Here’s my…

Mt. Rushmore of (Cult) Movies About Running Out of Time

Escape From New York

(1981)

Back in 1981, the year 2000 loomed as the probable end of the world with the world of the late-90s being a post-apocalyptic wasteland akin to the wild west, but with a lot more leather, chains, and spikes. This is the year that gave us Escape From New York. It’s set in, you guessed it, the post-apocalyptic world of 1997. The entire city of New York has been transformed into a maximum security prison. Air Force One has the misfortune of crash-landing there with the President of the United States onboard. Of course, only one man is sent in to save him – the rough and tumble Snake Plissken (Kurt Russell). In case it didn’t sound like hard enough a job, Our boy Snake only has 24 hours to get the job done. If you want, chase this one with its somehow goofier sequel, Escape From L.A.

Nick of Time

(1995)

Believe it or not, there was a time when a Johnny Depp performance didn’t require him to spend an ungodly amount of time in a makeup chair, or him prancing, and slurring his words. One such turn was this little thriller about a guy in the wrong place at the wrong time. He and his daughter get snatched up by some shady types. They then inform him that he must kill the woman in the picture they show him by 1:30. If the job isn’t done by then, they’re going to murder his little girl. The big catch is that 1:30 is only about an hour away. We get to live that hour with him in real time. For more quick, real-time fun, follow this up with Phone Booth.

Crank

(2006)

Jason Statham plays a hitman. We can stop here, and this post couldn’t get any manlier. Well, it can if we’re talking about this franchise. And we are. Anyhoo, his character is set up by some mob types. Instead of killing him the old-fashioned way, they inject him with something that slows the flow of adrenaline enough to make it difficult to sustain a heartbeat. He’s out to get revenge on the sonofabitch who did this to him. To do this he has to keep his heart rate up by any means necessary while trying to fulfill his quest. Yeah, he doesn’t have much time, and has to be awfully creative with the time he has. For a mind-numbing, but really fun night, pair this with its sequel, the much better/worse Crank: High Voltage.

Run Lola Run

(1998)

Manni is a bagman, just not a very good one. After delivering some illegal merch for his boss, he’s supposed to bring the money back. Quick and easy, right? Not really. This genius leaves the money on the train he was riding home. Of course, he doesn’t realize this until way too late. Let’s take a moment for a rant, shall we? I’ve never been a bagman, and I have no plans of ever being one. If I should somehow find myself in this position, I can’t guarantee that I’ll make that delivery. I can and will absolutely guarantee that leaving it on the train won’t be the way that I lose it. Someone scoping out that I’m carrying a wad of cash, going upside my head, and taking it from me? Possible. Me dropping it as I was running from the police and making the decision to not try picking it up? Also possible. Just getting scared because I see a cop, panicking, and leaving it on the train? No. These aren’t drugs, it’s money. Nothing illegal about holding it. Sigh. His boss, nice guy that he is, tells Manni he has 20 minutes to come up with the money or it’s lights out. He calls his girlfriend Lola (Franka Potente) fills her in on the situation and lets her know he’s about to rob the local supermarket to see if he can come up with the cash. Lola instantly springs into action. And man, do I mean spring. By the way, this isn’t 20 minutes stretched out over an hour and a half. This is 20 minutes in 20 minutes, from three different perspectives. And it’s fun as hell. Don’t bother with giving this one a companion piece. Watch it twice.

Thanks again to Mario for hosting. I love this blogathon. I promise that next year, or 2027, whenever you do this again. I’ll get my post in. On time.