Robin Hood (2010)

Directed by Ridley Scott.
2010. Rated PG-13, 140 minutes.
Cast:
Russell Crowe
Cate Blanchett
Oscar Isaac
Max von Sydow
Mark Strong
William Hurt
Danny Huston
Mark Addy
Kevin Durand
Léa Seydoux

The legend of Robin Hood, here played by Russell Crowe, has survive for ages by keeping him fairly simple. He and his band of merrymen, plus Lady Marion (Blanchett), roam Sherwood Forest and steal from the rich only so that they can give to the poor. Have you ever wondered how he wound up there? Me neither. However, in Ridley Scott’s sparkingly grimy update on the character that’s precisely what we find out. Oh, if you’re vexing over the oxy-moronic “sparkingly grimy” you have to see it to understand. Dirty people have seldom looked better.

Not content to merely be about our favorite archer, we’re treated to several other storylines to fret over. Most notable is one that emphasizes the difference between King Richard the Lionheart (Huston) and his brother and eventual successor John (Isaac). This supplies us with our hero’s reason to be heroic. Of course, there is also the love story and a couple other things going on. It’s not as convoluted as it sounds. Most of them breathe well enough on their own and come together nicely.

In the lead role, Russell Crowe does what Russell Crowe does. It’s not up there with his best, but it’s solid work, nonetheless. He’s actually outdone by Cate Blanchett as his love interest. Overall, the acting is very good. You should expect no less from the excellently assembled cast. The action scenes are solid, but not spectacular and evoke memories of Braveheart. However, they don’t quite measure up.

Evoking memories is a bit of a problem for this movie. It seems to blend the aforementioned Braveheart with another Scott/Crowe collaboration: Gladiator. The main problem is there seems to be little difference between our newly crowned King John and Gladiator’s Commodus, save for that whole incest thing. Instead of becoming something grand, it turns into a rather bland epic. It’s not bad, but it isn’t likely to stick in your psyche for very long.

Despite the best efforts of Kevin Cosner and Mel Brooks, the image most of us have of Robin Hood is one of Errol Flynn practically dancing up the stairs while sword fighting with multiple henchmen. Maybe we think of Flynn swing from the chandelier or from some other moment culled from all the fantastic cheese that movie provides. All the while, he’s wearing the unmistakable bright green tight and funny mustache. Hmmm…I’d dismissed all charges of homoeroticism against the classic until I wrote this paragraph. There’s nothing wrong with that. I just had a revelatory moment, that’s all. Anyhoo, the 21st century version is a solid, but flawed effort not likely to change the reality of our perception of what Robin Hood should be.

A Single Man

Directed by Tom Ford.
2009. Rated R, 99 minutes.
Cast:
Colin Firth
Julianne Moore
Nicholas Hoult
Matthew Goode
Ryan Simpkins
Jon Kortajarena

In 1962, George Falconer (Firth) is a college professor and gay man who becomes distraught when his partner of nearly two decades dies in a car accident. He contemplates suicide, finds comfort in the company of his friend/drinking buddy Charley (Moore) and is pursued by a rather persistent young man who also happens to be one of his students. Persistent is putting it nicely. He’s actually stalked, but since George never complains it’s all good.

We watch our hero in flashbacks to happier times with his mate, seriously consider sticking the gun from his desk drawer in his own mouth and squeezing the trigger, get interrupted, have a laugh with Charley or flirt with Kenny (Hoult), the stalker. This actually happens on a loop, so it seems as if we watch the same series of events play out repeatedly. Since we can tell rather early where this is all leading, it seems rather pointless..

Opportunities to really engage us go by the wayside. Yes, he’s a gay man in early sixties. There’s even a few hints that this is indeed a more intolerant time than our own, but nothing really relevant to the film. As I mentioned before, the young student stalks him which he brushes off. What we have is a situation based on obsession by the younger party and lust by the older with neither aspect really being explored. Even worse, the ethics of a professor seeing a student is never even brought into question.

There are some good things going on. George’s scenes with Charley are easily the best in the movie. They share memories, wine, laughs, even a sexual past. What makes these work is the empathy we feel for her. She’s been unlucky in love and clearly pines for a man she can never have in the way she wants.

Through it all, the actors turn in some excellent work. Firth is very good at showing his emotions on his face without over-emoting. It’s a nice, subtle performance. Julianne Moore is excellent. In the unsung role of Jim, the deceased lover seen only in flashbacks, Matthew Goode is also very good.

In the end, it’s a decent watch, but it doesn’t realize it’s full potential. The story is told in a manner suggesting we’re watching something important but never gets around to what that might be.

Cop Out

Directed by Kevin Smith.
2010. Rated R, 107 minutes.
Cast:
Bruce Willis
Tracy Morgan
Seann William Scott
Juan Carlos Hernandez
Sean Cullen
Kevin Pollack
Adam Brody
Cory Fernandez
Ana de la Reguera
Jason Lee

As Cop Out starts, an old favorite comes blaring from the speakers. It is the Beastie Boys “No Sleep Til Brooklyn” from their debut and hip hop classic album “License to Ill.” Then I notice it’s directed by the knight in shining armor to all slackers, Kevin Smith. Hey, I might be in good hands, here.

When we meet our heroes, Bruce Willis and Tracy Morgan, they’re about to interrogate a suspect. By the way, no character names in this review, the guilty must be exposed. Morgan is begging to do the questioning and Willis allows him to, knowingly against his better judgment. Morgan proceeds to bust into the interrogation move and do bits of dialogue from what must be at least a dozen other, better movies. Just in case you can’t recognize them all, Willis dutifully calls them out for us. This scene is painfully long and unfunny. Well, there is that one mildly humorous moment. Morgan hits us with Willis’ most famous one-liner, “Yippee-ki-yay, mother------“ from the Die Hard series, to which Willis says “Never saw that one.” So much for being in good hands.

Wait, is that “Follow the Leader” by Eric B. & Rakim, I hear? Why yes, it is. That’s two hip hop classics inside 15 minutes. This movie can’t be that bad. After all, could people with apparent love for the golden era fo rap make a thoroughly horrible film? Of course, they can. These thoughts whirl around my head while more unfunny things keep happening. To catch you up, the witness from the first scene agrees to set up the guy that drops off the goodies at his cell phone store. Obviously, this requires Morgan to dress up like a giant cell phone while Willis sits in the car and laughs at him. Both are distracted enough to do nothing while their snitch gets plugged full of holes from point blank range by an uzi. Nice. The giant cell phone and the guy from The Last Boy Scout give chase, but don’t catch the killer. They also cause and/or allow lots of property damage to happen and end up on YouTube. For their troubles, both are suspende without pay. This is of major importance to Willis who wants desperately to pay for his daughter’s unnecessarily extravagant wedding, but not so important to the guy from 30 Rock, who apparently doesn’t need money. He only needs to spy on his wife, whom he suspects of cheating on him.

Willis has an ace in the hole. He decides to sell an extremely rare and valuable baseball card he owns to get the dough for his baby girl’s nuptials. How did you know that didn’t work so well? Predictably, he loses the card which leads to Stifler from American Pie, aka Seann William Scott, a major character. Scott is at least able to generate a chuckle or two and somewhere along the way Run-DMC’s “King of Rock” temporarily seduces me into ignoring my pain.

Now, this movie would be completely worthless if it didn’t find a way to tie the baseball card into the case the guys were investigating before being suspended. It does, but so what? I’ll cut them the tiniest bit of slack for not being totally asleep at the wheel. I have to take it back because that’s not funny, either. Okay, fine. I’ll let them have the slack back for breaking out the Spanish version of Cypress Hill’s “Insane in the Membrane.”

Much like this review, this movie just keeps going. There is no justification for this film to last more than thirty minutes. Yet, it clanks its way through 107 excruciating hours…er…minutes. The characters are all flat-drawn stereotypes that add nothing. The action is nothing special and I think I’ve covered what they’re passing off as jokes.

However, all is not lost. Another forgotten gem comes on. This time, it’s an old R&B hit, “Don’t Disturb this Groove” by The System. I love that song. Then, it hits me. All of these songs are from my youth. The music that scores the rest of the movie sounds like it rejected for the original Beverly Hills Cop. Indeed, it is done by the same guy, Harold Faltermeyer. The buddy cop flick rose to prominence during the eighties, also. Could director Kevin Smith have outsmarted us all, and pulled a Tarantino by paying homage to a genre born of an era, long gone? Of course, that appears to be exactly what he’s done. However, doing that is simply not enough. You still have to make a good movie. The best of those movies were funny and contained big, exciting action sequences. This has Tracy Morgan dressed up like a cell phone.

MY SCORE: 0/10

Armored

Directed by Nimród Antal.
2009. Rated PG-13, 88 minutes.
Cast:
Columbus Short
Matt Dillon
Laurence Fishburne
Jean Reno
Amaury Nolasco
Fred Ward
Andre Kinney
Skeet Ulrich

Ty (Short) hasn’t been long home from the war and has taken a job with an armored car company. He’s also the legal guardian of his juvenile delinquent brother Jimmy (Kinney) and struggling to pay the mortgage on the house in which they live. So, when his buddy/co-worker/friend of his deceased dad Mike (Dillon) informs him of a scheme for a handful of the guys he works with and hangs out with at the local pub to rob two of the trucks they’re driving Ty, understandably but very reluctantly agrees to take part. Of course, he makes Mike promise “no one gets hurt.” Well, whaddya know? Someone gets hurt. Once that little line in the sand gets cross, Ty transforms into our hero, sorta. Him trying to keep the rest of the gang from killing hem ensues.

Columbus Short impresses. For me, that’s three excellent performances that are better than the movies they’re in. They are also of three very different characters in three different genres. There’s the hard-driving musical drama, Cadillac Records, the screwball comedy Death at a Funeral and now an action flick. I’ve really like him in those. The movies themselves, this one included, are a mixed bag.

Armored isn’t a bad movie. It’s just not as good as it should be. This is through no fault of its cast. Aside from Short and Dillon, there’s also Laurence Fishburne and Jean Reno. It was fun to see Fishburne smile, even if his character is kind of a nutjob. He’s long been one of my favorites, but his roles usually require him to be the ultra-serious type. This movie gives him a chance to cut loose a bit. It’s perhaps his most boisterous role since King of New York, way, way back in the day. Reno is a bit underused, but hey, he’s Jean Reno and is great merely because of that fact because I say so.

This film’s flaws lie in its script and apparent hurry to be over. At a couple ticks shy of 90 minutes, it’s a quick and fun flick that never actually threatens to stick with us. That could’ve been accomplished by letting us get to know the other men and their circumstances. However, aside from our knowledge Palmer (Nolasco) recently became devoutly religious, that’s never done. By the way, the only reason it’s done in his case is simply a set up for the climax to one of the action scenes.

If you’re looking for some action, Armored isn’t a bad way to go. It’s not of the non-stop and constantly over the top variety, but it is intriguing enough to carry us through. It’s just not intriguing enough to become anything more.

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus

Directed by Terry Gilliam.
2010. Rated PG-13, 123 minutes.
Cast:
Christopher Plummer
Heath Ledger
Lily Cole
Andrew Garfield
Verne Troyer
Tom Waits
Johnny Depp
Jude Law
Colin Farrell
Peter Stormare

Doctor Parnassus (Plummer) is a withered, often drunk old man who runs a traveling sideshow. He appears not to have many days left. However, we shortly learn that a deal with the devil, AKA Mr. Nick (Waits), has given him immortality. Despite the deal, Doc isn’t a bad guy. In fact, he used to be a particularly disciplined monk. He is also competing with the evil to “win” souls. Yes, he’s playing for the good guys.

What follows is a movie that’s alternately amazing and frustrating. Whenever someone enters the imaginarium we’re treated to some fantastic visuals and things move along nicely. These scenes function like action scenes in other movies, but with the addidional benefit of adding to the story. The problem is the story is continually adding stuff until it becomes convoluted. This bogs down the picture as it constantly winds back on itself, adds layers and only half-heartedly explains them in an effort to maintain the mystery. It’s also never really clear how or why a soul is won. It seems people go into the imaginarium, have a blast and Parnassus claims them as won. They see to want to give him their money, but are they truly converted, or reborn, or whatever it is he’s trying to get them to be?

When it’s good, it’s outstanding. Aside from those visuals, there are some great performances. Plummer is perfect as the world-weary elder. As his daughter Valentina, who is growing disenchanted with her increasingly cryptic father, Lily Cole is also excellent. Of course, the headline grabber is Heath Ledger, for very unfortunate reasons. This is the movie he was filming when he passed away. He is very good as the mysterious Tony, whom our heroes seem to need but don’t necessarily trust.

Ledger’s death led director Terry Gilliam to make an inspired choice that helps the movie immensely. It’s also one he probably wouldn’t have made if he didn’t have to. That choice is have three different actors take over Ledger’s role. Those three, in order of appearance, are Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Colin Farrell. The manner in which it is handled is nothing short of brilliant.

Like the best of Gilliam, this blurs the lines between fantasy and reality. However, this also blurs the line between good storytelling and bad. Both are present. Doctor Parnassus is an ambitious film and deserves to be lauded for that, but it tries to do too much which has the predictable effect of not doing much, at all.

Toy Story 3

Directed by Lee Unkrich.
2010. Rated PG, 103 minutes.
Cast:
Tom Hanks
Tim Allen
Joan Cusack
Ned Beatty
Don Rickles
Estelle Harris
Jodi Benson
Michael Keaton
John Ratzenberger
Emily Hahn
John Morris

Now that Andy (Harris) is all grown up, Woody (Hanks), Buzz (Allen) and the rest of the gang try to come to grips with what their future may hold.

As expected, our heroes find themselves on another adventure. This time, their own self-worth and mortality may be in greater jeopardy than ever before. In keeping with franchise tradition, the world toys inhabit when humans aren't looking is a vibrant, fascinating place. The comedy works without feeling forced and the action sequences exude a palpable sense of danger. Particularly near the end, our dread and anticipation brings us to the edge of our seats.

Getting back to that comedy for a moment, the visuals and the back and forth between characters work hand in hand to make it go. Of course, Hanks and Allen continue to complement one another flawlessly. Barbie (Benson) and Ken (Keaton) have been added to the mix and their relationship provides some wonderful moments. There is also lots of mileage gotten by poking fun of Ken’s masculinity, or lack thereof.

What really brings it all home is Lotso (Beatty). His look, voice and backstory come together perfectly. Equally as perfect is the creepy, mostly silent Big Baby. His tattered mid-section and lazy eye look exactly like a doll my sister once had. That thing moving around on its own is just frightening. What’s so remarkable about that, is it just is where Chucky and other movie dolls had to try really hard to be.

Visually, without the aid of 3D (I saw it in 2D), it is still high quality Pixar, just not awe-inspiring. With an established template, there is only so much that can be done to the series without drastically altering the look we’ve come to expect and love. However, I will say humans seem to be better rendered, this time around.

Overall, this is a great way to extend, or end, the series. Unlike so many other sequels, it doesn’t fell like a money-grab, whether it is or not. It feels like the logical next chapter of a great book. With three outstanding entries, it firmly places itself among the best cinematic trilogies of all time. I would be hard pressed to keep it out of the top handful. Even better than that, there could logically be a TS4. Why yes, I’d be pumped for that, too.

MY SCORE: 10/10

The End of October

Phew!!!! Sorry folks, after 31 days of ghouls and goblins of all sorts, I'm catching my breath today. It takes a day or so to switch back into normal mode.