Thursday, June 9, 2016

Thursday Movie Picks: Immortals


Welcome to Thursday. If you’re lucky, you will see many more Thursdays in your lifetime. What if you were lucky enough that it’s possible for you to see every Thursday from now until the end of time? Well, you would have enough time to watch every movie suggested for Thursday Movie Picks. For the uninitiated, Thursday Movie Picks is the wonderful weekly meme hosted by Wanderer at Wandering Through the Shelves. Yes, this week’s topic is movies featuring immortals. Here are three more for you to add to your growing to-watch list. Of course, they're not the movies you were thinking of. Where's the fun in that? You’ve got time for these, right?


Hercules in New York
(1969)
You know that Greek myth where Hercules is so bored of living on Mt. Olympus he comes down to Earth and becomes a professional wrestler? No? Well, here it is. By the way, Hercules also fancies himself a bit of a ladies’ man. Zeus and most of the rest of the gods are none too pleased and spend the entire movie contemplating our hero’s fate, ya know, whether he’ll remain immortal or not. Yes, it’s one hundred percent craptacular, but you should see it anyway. Why? It’s got some cinematic historical value. How? This is the first acting gig for one Arnold Schwarzenegger, strangely billed as Arnold Strong. I guess they figured Schwarzenegger was not a “movie star” name. Humph. If you don’t want to watch for that reason, then check it out because it’s so bad it’s awesome! Click here for my full review.


Abar, The First Black Superman
(1977)
This one is a bit of a stretch, maybe even a downright cheat. The movie never explicitly says our hero is immortal, but it doesn’t say that he isn’t, either. I’ll explain. At the beginning, really for over an hour of the film’s runtime, Abar is just a regular human being. He happens to be the leader of a Black Panther-like party that has come to the aid of a black family that just moved into a white neighborhood and is being harassed by their new neighbors. The patriarch of that family happens to be a scientist who develops his own “super serum” and decides Abar is just the guy to give it to. Since he’s “the first black Superman,” doesn’t that mean he becomes immortal after taking it? He’s certainly bulletproof, so I’ll say it does. Yeah, this is how the Blaxploitation era does superheroes. They do them so bad, they’re awesome! Click here for my full review.


Friday the 13th Part II
(1982)
I just refuse to tell you any plot details on this movie. I mean, just, sigh, no. I’ll only get into why I picked it. This is the first movie to feature Jason Voorhees as our killer. Every camp counselor thinks he can be killed. He can. Sort of. However, at the start of every subsequent movie he gets resurrected in some way, shape, or form. Sounds immortal to me. Anyhoo, either you can appreciate Friday the 13th movies, or you can’t, so I won’t waste time telling you it’s so bad it’s awesome. I can appreciate them, enthusiastically. Hell, I give just about all of them two hockey masks up! Uh, this one doesn’t actually feature the iconic hockey mask, just that damn sack in the pic above, but whatever. Click here to see why I love this franchise so much.


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28 comments:

  1. Of course you can never kill Jason. It will take someone like Freddy to really stop him instead of some mortal. I have heard of Hercules in New York but I've never seen it. Abar the First Black Superman has to be ridiculous. I gotta see those films. I'll take weird and films that are so bad, it's good.

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    1. Weird is a great way to describe both Hercules in New York and Abar. So you'll definitely get that out of them.

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  2. Well that's quite a trio, Dell!

    I have actually seen the Arnie film, unsurprisingly it's a piece of crap but interesting because of his involvement. Though he is ghastly in it. I've only seen the first Friday the 13th movie and was somehow convinced to go see Friday the 13th 3-D and that was the end for me! Abar is new to me and it sounds.....well it sounds awful but I might have to try and track it down.

    I usually get a kick out of these sort of films since they can go off in different directions so I'm looking forward to this week's picks. Here's the three I came up with.

    The Mummy (1999)-Slightly flaky but endearing librarian Evelyn (Rachel Weisz) with a knowledge of antiquities heads to the ancient city of Hamunaptra when her fun but conniving brother Jonathan (John Hannah) turns up with a trinket that could lead to great discoveries. Needing a guide they rescue Rick (Brendan Fraser) an adventurer who has knowledge of the area and also discover there is another band of explorers heading in the same direction and the race is on. Once they get there they accidentally awaken an ancient mummy who is hell bent on restoring his equally ancient girlfriend to life. Hijinks ensues. Deep? No. Fun? Yes.

    The Seventh Sign (1988)-Abby Quinn (Demi Moore) and her husband Russell (Michael Biehn) are awaiting the birth of their child, an event of great joy but some trepidation since Abby has lost a baby before. They rent their garage apartment out to a quiet unusual wanderer who Abby comes to believe is there to kill her baby and bring about the apocalypse and seeks to avert either happening. During the same period the Vatican assigns Father Lucci to investigate the various signs that are appearing but Father Lucci has reasons of his own to seek the truth.

    The Picture of Dorian Gray (1945)-Young and beautiful Dorian Gray mentions to his reprobate friend Lord Henry that he wishes the portrait he has just had painted could age while he stays eternally young and lives a life of debauchery. Inexplicably his wish comes true and he turns into a hedonistic cad who is left unmarked by his callous behavior. Solid adaptation of Oscar Wilde’s story with a touching performance from an impossibly young Angela Lansbury as the ill-fated Sibyl Vane. She scored her second Oscar nomination for it before turning 21, the youngest person ever to do so, a record that still stands.

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    1. Ha! Everything about Hercules in New York is ghastly. That's what makes it so great. Same for Abar.

      I've seen the first two of your picks. The Mummy is a fun Indiana Jones ripoff. I found The Seventh Sign all sorts of boring, but I was only 17 when I saw it and much more interested in getting into the pants of the girl I saw it with. Might be time for a rewatch. Your last pick has been on my watchlist forever.

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  3. I can always count on you to pick some brilliant obscure film that no one else would have thought of. Unfortunately I haven't heard of Abar but the other two I know by reputation. Hercules in New York is an inspired pick. And your theory about Jason is - I think - spot on! But as I can't watch horror I will not be investigating further.

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    1. Thanks! Most people haven't heard of Abar, so don't feel bad.

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  4. I remember watching about 15 minutes of Hercules in New York only for Arnie's first movie appearance and was bored TO TEARS so I turned it off. That doesn't happen often. Everything about it is stiff and awkward - it just lies there, barely breathing.

    I had a feeling you would go with one of the Friday the 13th films, and who can blame you? I might have gone with one of the Halloween films myself, but that's just me.

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    1. That stiffness and awkwardness just adds to the unintentional hilarity of it all.

      Yay, Jason.

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  5. I loved this post, especially seeing Jason appear on there. He's definitely immortal!

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  6. I've heard of Hercules in New York and i've seen clips of the film, the clips don't exactly show Arnie acting abilities in a good light...

    I too picked a horror franchise, but it was the Hellraiser franchise. Plenty to choose from, haha.

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    1. Oh, this was well before Arnie had any acting abilities, lol.

      Pinhead, nice.

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  7. have heard of this Hercules and that Arnie's name was shortened but have never seen this gem..made of plastic and bought at Dollarama. I love the Blaxploitation films and this sounds like a hoot. I will never watch any of the Friday the 13th movies

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    1. Were you following me when I bought it? Since I'm expecting a Criterion edition any day now, I think I got a tremendous bargain.

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  8. I knew I would have seen Jason here. Nobody can beat him, not even if he's wearing a sack instead of the hockey mask.

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  9. The fact that you consistently include such awful movies in your Thursday movie picks makes me ridiculously happy. So much fun! Now you've got me wondering if I could get drunk enough to watch Hercules in New York.

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    1. I'm happy to entertain. Why not make a drinking game out of it and get drunk WHILE you watch Hercules in New York? Take a chug every time someone refers to someone, themselves included, as a god and/or every time Arnie has at least one nipple exposed.

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  10. I've only seen Friday The 13th II, that's a great pick. Jason fits this theme so well. The other two sound like campy fun. Where do you find these? lol

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    1. In the nooks and crannies of the movie universe, of course.

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  11. I haven't seen any of these! Wow Dell, you sure knows how to find off-the-beaten-path movies :D Ahah, look at how huge Arnie was in Hercules in New York!

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    1. Thanks. That was right in the middle of his bodybuilding days. Every inch of him was ripped!

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  12. Lol. I have only seen Friday the 13th II which I thought was really fun and enjoyable. I definitely see it falling under the so bad its awesome category.

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    1. For me, fun and enjoyable describes the entire Friday the 13th franchise.

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  13. I am far more versed in Halloween and Nightmare on Elm Street as far as 80s horror franchises go. I know I've seen 2 though. It's just been years. I should go back through them someday on your recommendation. I saw one of these pop up somewhere else as well. Your first two picks look like straight classics! Good stuff, man!

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    1. I'm a sucker for Jason flicks, but yeah, I recommend them. Thanks!

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  14. Arnold Strong...seems like they found spelling and pronouncing it hard too.

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