Slumdog Millionaire

Slumdog Millionaire

Directed by Danny Boyle.

2008. Rated R, 116 minutes.

Dev Patel

Freida Pinto

Madhur Mittal

Anil Kapoor

Jamal (Patel) is one question away from winning it all on Mumbai's version of "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" He's also uneducated and poor so the police are questioning him to find out if he's been cheating.

The screenplay is exceptionally written. It weaves the gameshow, the interrogation and Jamal's life together beautifully. Each flashback is a harrowing adventure for us to get caught up in. The movie also causes us a bit of a moral dilemma as we try to decide how we feel about Jamal's brother, Salim. Director Danny Boyle does a masterful job of pulling things together, and went on to win Best Director at this year's Oscars. It's right there with Trainspotting as my favorite movie of his. And his lead actor is a charmer.

The ending is ultimately predictable and a little too fairytale. Also, since the movie covers most of our hero's life there are three sets of actors playing him, his brother and Latika, the love of his life. Visually, it works splendidly but it robs us of any real chemistry between the actors that play them during the present.

That we can predict the ending is only a small drawback to our enjoyment. This movie is much more about the journey than the destination, and what a wonderful journey it is. By the time we realize we've been tricked into a chick flick, we're totally immersed in the storytelling and thoroughly enjoying the ride. And yes, I did call the winner of the Academy's Best Picture award (and 7 other Oscars) for 2008 a chick flick.

MY SCORE: 8.5/10

What Doesn't Kill You

Directed by Brian Goodman.

2008. Rated R, 100 minutes.
Cast:
Mark Ruffalo
Ethan Hawke
Amanda Peet
Will Lyman
Brian Goodman
Donnie Wahlberg
Angela Featherstone
Edward Lynch

Two lifelong best friends, Brian (Ruffalo) and Paulie (Hawke), and career criminals deal with the trials and tribulations of the life they’ve chosen.

Though neither is a likeable guy, their frustration with where they’ve found themselves draws us in. To facilitate this we get excellent performances from both Ruffal and Hawke. Ruffalo, in particular, is outstanding. It’s an unfortunately overlooked portrayal of a man with many demons. The city of Boston is also a menacing character. Refreshingly, it’s subtly so. Unlike a lot of other movies set there, this one never puts it in your face. There are no extended scenes scored by blaring Irish music, no ridiculously bad New England accents, no shamrocks and no references to the Celtics or Red Sox. Instead, the city either mirrors the bleakness or hope of our heroes, depending on what’s going on, or enforces its own will upon them. It not only helps set the mood, but to change it, as well.

Our two (anti) heroes work for Sully (Lyman). We know they’re frustrated with their position in his organization and have an idea of the type of relationship he has with them, but it could’ve been much more fleshed out. How what transpires affect him might’ve added even more depth. I would also like to have seen more Detective Moran (Wahlberg). The subplot involving his character and Brian could’ve developed into an intriguing cat-and-mouse but instead, it’s a wasted opportunity.

This is definitely for those of us into gritty, urban drama. It gives us great acting and a story that keeps us locked in throughout. Interesting tidbit: apparently, this is inspired by the director’s real life.

MY SCORE: 7.5/10

The Strangers

Directed by Bryan Bertino.
2008. Rated R, 88 minutes
Cast:
Liv Tyler
Scott Speedman
Gemma Ward
Kip Weeks

A group of masked strangers terrorize a young couple at their summer home in the woods. The movie works hard to extract fear and dread from the tension of the situation and resists the urge to compile a bunch of cheap jump-scares or use a lot of gore. Liv Tyler proves to be a capable scream queen. Unlike much of his other work, Scott Speedman actually appears lifelike.

Our bad guys can get in and out of the house apparently at will yet still resort to cheap "scary" tactics like axing the front door. They can also control sound, I guess. They make extremely loud noises sometimes, which I get. What I don't get is they also do some things in silence that should be audible for at least half a mile. This gives them a superhuman quality that isn't needed. It makes the grave mistake of telling us the ending at the beginning. That has worked in lots of movies but in this instance it renders the whole thing pointless. It tells you what's going to happen and then spends the next hour and a half barrelling towards that inevitable conclusion without any mystery as to how we're going to arrive there. Therefore, an ending that could've been shocking, disturbing or some other awesome -ing is left impotent, or more accurately limp from its pre-mature activity.

It's actually a pretty good watch at home, at night, in the dark because the possibility of the situation is one most of us have at least thought about once or twice. However, it's not as good as it should be. Horror fans give it a look but don't expect the next great thing.

MY SCORE: 5.5/10

The Ruins

Directed by Carter Smith
2008. Rated R, 93 minutes.
Cast: 
Jena Malone
Jonathan Tucker
Shawn Ashmore
Laura Ramsey
Joe Anderson
Sergio Calderon
Dmitri Baveas

Two young couples on vacation in Cancun decide to spend their last day in town with a fellow tourist at an archeological dig of an ancient Mayan site. Weirdness and bloodiness ensues.

It does a nice job building momentum as the situation gets more and more desperate. Having one of our heroes as a med student (Tucker) is a stroke of genius. He quickly tries to grab the mantle of leadership and often imposes his will on others as his "skill" is sorely needed for their survival. However, the others attempt to rebel giving us a nice Lord of the Flies type friction amongst them. Gore is used sparingly but very effectively. We also get a pretty nice ending.

How and why this particular place got to be this particular way is a completely unexplained mystery. Since we're talking about killer plants here, I don't think a scene of one of the local yokels explaining the history would be too much to ask. Instead, we get a faceless group that seems to be a tribe guarding the outskirts of the site. None of them speak the least bit of English and none of our heroes speak Spanish. Therefore, the disconnect meant to add to the horror is merely an inconvenience for the audience.

Horror fans should have a look because it's a solid entry into the genre. That's not to say it's a classic or even remotely close to being one but I found it enjoyable.

MY SCORE: 6.5/10

Cloverfield

Directed by Matt Reeves.

2008. Rated PG-13, 84 minutes.
Cast:
Mike Vogel
Jessica Lucas
Lizzy Caplan
Odette Yustman
TJ Miller
Michael Stahl-David
Margot Fairley

New York City is under siege by a giant monster. Again.

In the old Godzilla movies we always saw people running and screaming. However, the stories always focused on a few people who were tasked to stop or help Godzilla. The basic idea here is to focus on a random group of people among those running and screaming who essentially have nothing to do with what would normally be the main plot. They aren’t out to stop this menace. They’re really just trying to keep from getting killed by it as they move about the city in hopes of saving a friend. This approach works very well. It accomplishes several things: It keeps the monster from being overexposed, gives it an air of originality and of course, keeps the budget down. Speaking of budget, what they did with theirs is spectacular. The monster is beautifully rendered, as are the parasites that fall from it. Still, the real success of the special fx team is the city itself. If you rent this, watch the special features on the DVD. You will be amazed at just how much of this movie was made on a computer.

The cast of characters are some of the dumbest people in cinematic history. Hud (Miller), who’s holding the handheld camera for most of the movie is seen through, is the worst offender. Nearly every time he opens his mouth he gives a new answer to the question “How stupid can you be?” These people put hate in my heart. I was rooting for the monster. Well, except for in the case of Jessica Lucas who plays Lilly but only because she’s…uh…fine. Forget I said that. Anyhoo, they also left the door wide open for a sequel that will likely be far worse. My reasoning is since nothing is explained here, they’ll spend much of the second movie developing some cockamamie story to satisfy the internet fanboys who feverishly debate where the monster came from. It will simply be a run-of-the-mill creature-feature with a Hollywood ending. Seriously, once you’ve shot your wad with all this “mysterious monster” business what else can you do? Once the gimmick is successful, leave well enough alone and just count the millions you’ve made.

This is for people who want to see a different kind of monster movie. Basically, it’s the Blair Witch Project of the genre. Thankfully, I haven’t had a bunch of morons trying to convince me it was real like they did when Blair Witch came out. However, I have had people telling me about all kinds of stuff they read online that supposedly fills in the back story for both the monster and the inane people we’re stuck with. Enough already. It wasn’t in the actual movie so I don’t really care. If you can manage to turn your brain off for an hour and a half, you’ll enjoy the ride. If not, skip it.

Ip Man

Directed by Wilson Yip.
2008. Rated R, 106 minutes.
Cast:
Donnie Yen
Simon Yam
Siu-Wong Fan
Ka Tung Lam
Yu Xing
You-Nam Wong
Chen Zhi Hui

The Chinese city of Fo-Shan is famous for its martial arts. No one in town is more famous than Master Ip (Yen) AKA Ip Man. Though he doesn’t teach formally, young hopefuls are constantly seeking his counsel. When other masters want to test their mettle, they challenge him to a duel. It’s only natural that when some tough guys from out of town want to prove themselves worthy of opening up their own school in Fo-Shan they wind up on the doorstep of Ip’s palatial estate. All of this is in the days just before the Japanese invading China and pretty much taking over Fo-Shan. They even set up shop in Ip’s house, leaving the master, his wife and young son to find shelter in parts of town destroyed by bombings. Ip is forced to take hard labor jobs to get just barely enough food for his family avoid starving to death. What good is all his knowledge and skill in the art of hand-to-hand combat in a world where he and his fellow countrymen have been relegated to second class citizenship in their own land?

Ip Man is loosely based on the life of Bruce Lee’s mentor. It combines the larger themes of survival, cultural preservation and national pride and combines them with the more traditional kung-fu motifs of revenge and honor to create a rather concise epic that neither overstays its welcome nor rushes us along from fight to fight. It works both narratively and viscerally. It’s story-telling isn’t groundbreaking, but it is effective. The fighting is wonderfully brutal. Even as our tale develops and twists, the next action scene is never too far away nor too near. Let’s face it, we watch martial arts movies for the martial arts. This film understands this, gives us plenty of it but doesn’t sacrifice narration.

To make those fight scenes work, we need a star who can pull them off. In the title role, Donnie Yen is a delightful blur of flying fists punctuated by his long gown-like shirt flapping in his self-created wind. Appropriately placed close-ups reveal the landing of many bone-crushing blows. I was moved to say “ouch” on a number of occasions. For fans of martial arts flicks Ip Man is a must-see. It is the best such movie of the last several years by a good margin. Of course, if you’re not into martial arts flicks then skip it. Shame on you.

MY SCORE: 8/10

Bedtime Stories

Directed by Adam Shankman.
2008. Rated PG, 99 minutes.
Cast:
Adam Sandler
Keri Russell
Guy Pearce
Courtney Cox

Plot: Hotel maintenance man Skeeter (Sandler) babysits his sister's kids for a few days while she's out of town. With their help, he comes up with elaborate bedtime stories which amazingly become reality.

The Good: It's so gosh-darn cute. The kids are cute. The stories are cute. The way they translate into reality is cute. Therefore, our viewing is sprinkled with chuckles and giggles. All of this helps to keep things moving along nicely as the movie bounds from one tale to the next.

The Bad: It's so gosh-darn cute. Since it is, it's not afraid to pile on the cheese. So, in between the giggles and chuckles you might be rolling your eyes a lot. It doesn't help that the plot is a paint-by-numbers job.

The Ugly: The Booger Monster.

Recommendation: This is solid family fare. The stories are inventive, so they hold your attention as the movie bounces merrily along. There's really not much here to offend even the hardcore prudes, but it is predictable. You're willing to forgive all that because, well, it's just so gosh-darn cute.

MY SCORE: 6.5/10

Baby Mama

Directed by Michael McCullers.
2008. Rated PG-13, 99 minutes.
Cast:
Tina Fey
Amy Poehler
Sigourney Weaver
Greg Kinnear
Dax Shepard
Romany Malco
Steve Martin

Kate (Fey) hears her biological clock ticking in IMAX quality surround sound. She’s a successful career woman, but at 37, she wants very badly to have a baby. With no man in her life, she tries artificial insemination. After a number of failed attempts she goes through a very special agency that hires Angie (Poehler) to be her surrogate. To say they are different is quite an understatement. Kate is focused and goal-oriented. She’s been steadily climbing the ladder in corporate America. Angie seems to have been, or will be, a guest on “Jerry Springer.” Despite the obvious contrast, Kate is undeterred when she meets Angie and her common-law husband Carl (Shepard).

Their differences between the ladies are supposed to make them a funny pair. It doesn’t. There are moments here and there that are mildly amusing. However, if you’ve seen the trailer, you’ve seen most of them. The ones you haven’t involve Malco as the doorman. Still, there’s only a few of those. He also doubles as Angie’s conscience. Then there’s the running joke about the lady who runs the agency. Played by Sigourney Weaver, the joke is that even though she’s up in age she is pregnant while Kate cannot get that way.

What’s left is the story. Surprisingly, it holds up better than the humor. The twists are effective, throwing the plot in new directions. It adds enough layers to keep things somewhat interesting. Of course, there’s the prerequisite love story. This one is between Kate and Rob (Kinnear). Yes, it includes the expected ups and downs and once a certain thing happens in another part of the story, we can predict what the outcome here will be. Still, all of this is more intriguing than any part of it that tries to make us laugh.

All told, Baby Mama is a light-hearted take on what could be a gravely serious subject. It completely skirts any discussion of ethics, instead using its topic as a springboard for its punchlines. It approaches the class difference between Kate and Angie in the same manner. The movie has its moments, but feels flat in too many places. It isn’t a terrible watch, but it is highly forgettable.

Tony Manero

Directed by Pablo Larraín.
2008. Rated R, 98 minutes, Spanish.
Cast:
Alfredo Castro
Paola Lattus
Héctor Morales
Amparo Noguera
Elsa Poblete

Ask movie critics to name the greatest American dance movies and they’re likely to recite the titles of films starring Fred Astaire or Gene Kelly. No offense to those classics, but in the hearts of regular folks they were dethroned in 1978 by a little movie named Saturday Night Fever. At the time, it was the epitome of cool. It’s arguably the absolute peak of the disco era. Thirty years later, lead character Tony Manero is still the role most associated with John Travolta.

Apparently, the fictional Manero is an icon in Chile, also. When we meet Raul (Castro) in the days shortly after the film became a global phenomenon, he’s trying to get on a cheesy TV show that’s holds look-alike contests every week. He has shown up the week they’re doing Chuck Norris. He’s told he’s in the right place because they ask people to register a week in advance. Next week they’re doing Tony Manero. Very shortly, we find out he’s also the lead dancer in a SNF tribute show he’s constantly rehearsing for. It’s put on at the cantina that he lives above. The rest of his troupe includes his girlfriend, her daughter and the daughter’s boyfriend. Of course, he plays Manero. Seemingly, once a day he makes it down to the local movie theater which is currently running SNF. Clearly, he’s obsessed.

Raul’s obsession of choice, combined with the fact that he’s over 50 years old might seem a bit off putting. However, its just quirky enough to root for. What works against him, because it mortifies us, is that he’s a bad guy. I mean, he’s really a bad guy. His fixation on becoming the best Tony Manero he can be drives him to nearly unfathomable depths. Suffice it to say, as far as he’s concerned, murder is always a viable option. There is a political element at work here, as well. It is set during the early days of the Pinochet dictatorship. The director, Pablo Larraín, is known to be critical of his own culture. In this instance, could he implying that his people’s fixation on western culture is unhealthy?

The small dance troupe, plus the lady that owns the cantina make up Raul’s inner-circle. They’ve no idea of the atrocities he’s committing against the local population, but he’s hardly nice to them, either. He’s brooding, self-centered and has a hair-trigger temper. Still, the women involved pretty much throw themselves at him. It makes some sense because they’re a tight, if often bickering unit. We get the impression these ladies a) are horny and b) don’t get out as much as they used to. This makes him the most viable option. He soaks it all in, remorselessly doing whatever he pleases. Ironically, this doesn’t include actual sex. Despite his best efforts, we see him fail, time and again, in graphically miserable fashion. Another stab at our decadent lifestyle, perhaps? Maybe, this is a dig at those in power in Chile at the time. Both?

Through it all, the focus on his goal remains. The contest Raul wants so badly to win is rapidly approaching and the man he wants so badly to be is fleeting. The steps he takes toward achieving both goals repulses us. However, because of those steps his determination is almost admirable. He comes to define the word antihero. Possible politics aside, this a truly fascinating character study. When the credits roll, we’re not completely sure how we feel about it even though we know how we should feel. It seems Raul has much more in common with another 70s American movie icon, Travis Bickle of Taxi Driver.

Soul Men

Director: Malcolm D. Lee.
2008. Rated R, 98 minutes.
Cast:
Samuel L. Jackson
Bernie Mac
Sharon Leal
Adam Herschman

Plot: Floyd (Mac) and Louis (Jackson) were once superstars as part of a Motown style 1960s group called "The Real Deal," along with lead singer Marcus Hooks (real R&B star John Legend) who went on to a legendary career as a soloist. After Hooks' death, the two reunite for a tribute show to Marcus, despite years away from the stage and lots of unresolved issues between them. Hijinks and shenanigans on their way to New York ensues.

The Good: At it's core, its about two older gentlemen with larger-than-life personalities talking a lot of smack to one another and anyone who crosses their path. Both Mac and Jackson excel at saying outlandish things that make you laugh even though you know you probably shouldn't think they're funny. The two also forge a very believable chemistry, allowing them to seemingly ad-lib their way through much of the movie. And for those of us who saw their first "adult" movie back in the late 1970s or early 1980s, there's a Vanessa Del Rio sighting.

The Bad: The plot unfolds in a completely unsurprising manner. It's so paint-by-the-numbers it simply relies on the mouths of the two stars to keep it interesting. This is problematic because on those rare occasions when only one or neither of them are on the screen the movie can no longer mask it's weaknesses. Even when they are both on the screen, it just trudges through things we already knew would happen.

The Ugly: Bernie Mac literally hits below the belt. Ouch.

Recommendation: Fans of the two stars should really like this movie. It showcases their personas and lets them have fun. Since they seem to be having so much fun its easy to let implausibilities and cliches slide. For people who aren't big fans, particularly of Mac, then it'll be an easily forgotten road movie that breaks no new ground. RIP to both Bernie Mac and Isaac Hayes, who also appears in the movie. Warning: Extremely potty-mouthed, our heroes use the various conjugations of mf as a noun, verb and adjective and most places a comma, period or exclamation point should go.

MY SCORE: 7/10

Let the Right One In

Let the Right One In AKA Lat den ratte komma in

2008. Rated R, 114 minutes.

Director: Tomas Alfredson. Starring Kare Hedebrant, Lina Leandersson, Per Ragnar, Henrik Dahl.

Plot: In a 1982 suburb of Stockholm, 12 year old bully-magnet Oskar (Hedebrant) befriends Eli (Leandersson), the mysterious girl who's moved into the apartment next to his. Her arrival in town coincides with a series of grisly murders in which the victims had the blood drained from their bodies.

The Good: It's a very unique vampire movie. In fact, it's more of a puppy-love movie featuring two 12 year olds. It just so happens that the girl is a vampire. That's the twist that makes it sizzle. A constant tension hangs over the film as we try to figure out whether she'll hurt or help him and for a while, whether he'll find out what she really is. It also uses her obvious power and his weakness to build metaphors and give Oskar a life-lesson. The pacing of the movie is deliberately slow, but doesn't drag. It draws you into this awkward yet budding romance. Don't worry though, it's not some sappy affair. We get a number of 30 Days of Night-esque attacks on the human-folk.

The Bad: At the beginning of the movie, Eli has an adult, presumably human guardian who actually commits the early murders and brings her the blood (not at all a spoiler). We never really learn the nature of their relationship (it's vaguely hinted at, once). Also, about midway through the movie something happens to him, or at least seems to. Despite the fact what we've seen suggests we should, we never see him again. That was bothersome for me. It's like they all of sudden forgot about him.

The Ugly: When our two lovebirds share their first kiss. When you see it, you'll say "Ewwww."

Recommendation: Though the main characters are both only 12 years old, well one is 12 and the other just appears to be (they do discuss this, by the way), this is not another vampire movie for teenage girls. This is for more mature fans of the genre who've seen plenty of them and are looking for a fresh take on the subject. Subtitleophobes can breathe easy. This is a Swedish film, but the DVD plays the English dubbed version by default.

The Opposite View: Owen Gleiberman, Entertainment Weekly

What the Internet Says: 8.2/10 on imdb.com (#192 all time as of 4/14/09), 97% on rottentomatoes.com, 82/100 on metacritic.com

MY SCORE: 9/10

What Doesn't Kill You

Directed by Brian Goodman.
2008. Rated R, 100 minutes.
Cast:
Mark Ruffalo
Ethan Hawke
Amanda Peet
Will Lyman
Brian Goodman
Donnie Wahlberg
Angela Featherstone
Edward Lynch

Plot: Two lifelong best friends, Brian (Ruffalo) and Paulie (Hawke), and career criminals deal with the trials and tribulations of the life they’ve chosen.

The Good: Though neither is a likeable guy, their frustration with where they’ve found themselves draws us in. To facilitate this we get excellent performances from both Ruffalo and Hawke. Ruffalo, in particular, is outstanding. It’s an unfortunately overlooked portrayal of a man with many demons. The city of Boston is also a menacing character. Refreshingly, it’s subtly so. Unlike a lot of other movies set there, this one never puts it in your face. There are no extended scenes scored by blaring Irish music, no ridiculously bad New England accents, no shamrocks and no references to the Celtics or Red Sox. Instead, the city either mirrors the bleakness or hope of our heroes, depending on what’s going on, or enforces its own will upon them. It not only helps set the mood, but to change it, as well.

The Bad: Our two (anti) heroes work for Sully (Lyman). We know they’re frustrated with their position in his organization and have an idea of the type of relationship he has with them, but it could’ve been much more fleshed out. How what transpires affect him might’ve added even more depth. I would also like to have seen more Detective Moran (Wahlberg). The subplot involving his character and Brian could’ve developed into an intriguing cat-and-mouse but instead, it’s a wasted opportunity.

The Ugly: What happens the first time Brian meets Moran.

Recommendation: This is definitely for those of us into gritty, urban drama. It gives us great acting and a story that keeps us locked in throughout. Interesting tidbit: apparently, this is inspired by the director’s real life.

MY SCORE: 7.5/10

Gunnin' For That #1 Spot

Directed by Adam Yauch.
2008. Rated PG-13, 90 minutes.
Cast:
Michael Beasley
Brandon Jennings
Kyle Singler
Jerryd Bayless
Kevin Love
Tyreke Evans
Donte Greene
Lance Stephenson
Bobbito Garcia

In September of 2006, the mecca of streetball, otherwise known as New York City's Rucker Park, puts on it's first ever "Elite 24" game. This is a game involving 24 of the highest ranked high school basketball players in the nation. This documentary focuses on eight of the players, a number of whom have already moved on to the NBA. Director Adam Yauch, of Beastie Boys fame, has chosen his subjects wisely. They're from diverse backgrounds with a wide range of personalities. The first two thirds of the movie does a nice job showcasing this. We also get some insight into how the sometimes shady people who run recruiting websites work and how the often shadier agents and shoe companies try to hook these kids young. There's even a nice pre-game speech given by then New Jersey Nets head coach Lawrence Frank. I highly suggest watching the full length version of the speech, found among the special features on disc 2, especially if you're an aspiring ball player. On the court, we get the sort of high energy and acrobatic game, enhanced by the never-silent courtside MC Bobbito Garcia, that we've come to expect from Rucker Park events. Though, admittedly this isn't the constant trickeration of an And 1 tape. Still, many of the plays are amplified by terrifically done sound effects and the soundtrack is a lively mostly hip hop affair (lots of Jay Z, by the way). The unquestioned star is current Miami Heat forward Michael Beasley. From what we see, he appears to have been the best player on the court that day but that's not what makes him the star. What does it is his big-time, motor-mouth driven personality. With good reason, he was mic'd for the game. He talks and talks and talks. Then he talks some more. Most of it is pure basketball smack. However, we still like him because he comes off similarly to NFL wide receiver/showman Chad Ochocinco. Even when Beasley is saying something harsh, you get the sense that it's all in fun. As proof, in this machismo charged atmosphere no one seems to even bat an eye over his more venomous barbs. There does seem to be a little mano y mano between him and current Minnesota Timberwolves forward Kevin Love. Still, even as they try to stare each other down they both appear on the verge of uncontrollable laughter. All said, we have a solid basketball documentary. It's not emotionally charged like Hoop Dreams but it's an excellent watch for b-ball fans. Look for current Cleveland Cavalier J. J. Hickson and Kansas star Cole Aldrich, who are two of the players not chronicled. There are also brief appearances in the crowd and after the game by Jason Kidd, Ben Gordon and Steve Nash. If you're not into basketball, don't bother.


MY SCORE: 7.5/10

Gran Torino

Directed by Clint Eastwood.
2008. Rated R, 116 minutes.
Cast:
Clint Eastwood
Bee Vang
Ahney Her
Christopher Carley

Plot: Bitter, old, racist widower Walt (Eastwood) begrudgingly takes a liking to the Asian teenagers who live next door, even after one of them tried to steal his 1972 Gran Torino.

The Good: Like most Eastwood directed movies, the story breathes and the characters develop without dragging. As our ever-abrasive (anti)hero, Clint proves himself more than a capable actor as well. Through his portrayal, enabled by an excellent script, he gives Walt pain, bitterness and depth. That depth most often surfaces in his exchanges with Father "J" (Carley). His young female costar, Ahney Her who plays Sue, has a real presence and commands attention. She appears to have a bright future if, ironically enough, her race doesn't typecast her.

The Bad: The racial epithets constantly flying from Walt's mouth are fine because they're germaine to the story. However, a better job could've been done showing more diversity within the different ethnicities. Not doing so lends credence to his racism and undermines what appears to be the moral of the story. In other words, since most of the Asians, Blacks and Hispanics we see are low-lives, why shouldn't he behave the way he does? Acting wise, Vang who plays Thao, appears to give a forced performance. However, since his character's relationship with Walt is akin to Daniel's with Mr. Miyagi in The Karate Kid I can live with it. It's not like Ralph Macchio was really all that great, either. Yes, I realize that's blasphemy to those of you old enough to care.

The Ugly: What happens to Sue.

Recommendation: This a very good drama for about 100 minutes followed by an ending that elevates it to the level of excellence. It might sound strange but it's really a hybrid of Falling Down and the aforementioned The Karate Kid. However, it doesn't just copy them. It borrows elements of both and adds some of its own to create something different.

MY SCORE: 9/10

Tokyo Gore Police

Directed by Yoshihiro Nishimura.
2008. Not Rated, 110 minutes.
Cast:
Eihi Shiina
Itsuji Itao
Yukihide Benny
Jiji Bû
Ikuko Sawada
Cay Izumi
Mame Yamada

Sometimes you read the title of a movie and know you’re in for a wild ride. When your suspicions are confirmed within the first two minutes, you have a decision to make. Do you hit the stop button and end the madness now? Or do you subject yourself to what you know will be completely bonkers. If you keep going, you do so echoing the sentiments of legendary basketball coach Bobby Knight: if being raped is inevitable, you might as well enjoy it.

Okay, it’s not even remotely close to rape. However, it is something most normal people wouldn’t call entertainment. Note that I’ve never once claimed to be normal. What it is, is arguably one of the most ridiculous and without queston the most ridiculously bloody movie I’ve sat through. I don’t mean bloody like the English might say. I mean just plain old bloody. The slightest laceration sets off a geyser of bodily fluid. It literally sprays in all directions, by the gallon. It even seems to be raining blood in one scene.

There is a story, here. At some point in the future Tokyo’s police force has been privatized much like Detroit’s in Robocop. In general, crime in Tokyo isn’t nearly as widespread. Instead, most of the PD’s efforts concentrates on catching and killing “Engineers”. No, we’re not talking about any type of engineer you’ve ever heard of. Here, Engineers are a special breed of criminal. They basically try to kill anyone they come into contact with and keep killing until they themselves are dead. They’re not easy to kill. When wounded, whatever part of them has suffered the damage transforms into some sort of weapon. For instance, when the first Engineer we meet loses his arm, it grows back with a chainsaw attached. Seriously. And you’ll just have to see for yourself what happens when one guy’s penis is bitten off. Yup, I said bitten off. You did notice that this movie isn’t rated, right?

We focus on Ruka (Shiina). She’s the best “Engineer Hunter”. It stands to reason she’s so good at her job because she likes killing. Just ask that poor guy on the subway train. I would tell you what happens there, but that would deprive you of the joy of being surprised. You see that? I wrote that like you might actually watch it. Go ahead. I dare you.

If that’s not enough incentive then think about some of the other visuals you’re missing out on. There’s the woman who’s lower half transforms into what resembles an alligator’s head, the guy who pulls the skin off the top half of his own head, the woman stuffed in the cardboard box that’s only big enough for a few of my kid’s toys. Actually, she’s not stuffed at all, but piled there. Yeah, you kinda have to see it to understand. Believe it, or not, I left a lot out.

Bringing this out of the constant stream of gross-out moments for a minute, there is an interesting dynamic to the writing. Again borrowing from Robocop and even a little from The Warriors, TGP uses a string of wacky commercials and a hyped up dispatch lady to not only provide comic relief but also creates an element of satire that runs through the film. Whether or not it is sharp social commentary I probably need to know a lot more about contemporary Japanese culture to say. Some of it is universal and works just fine.

If you’re looking for something totally outrageous, this is the movie for you. It’s live-action anime with one visual after another you may never forget. I’ve read reviews that say this movie isn’t good or bad but exactly what it tries to be: perverse, bizarre, gory, silly and a number of other adjectives. I prefer to say it the way you’re used to me saying. It’s so bad, it’s awesome!

MY SCORE -10/10

Bronson

Directed by Nicolas Winding Refn.
2008. Rated R, 92 minutes.
Cast:
Tom Hardy
Amanda Burton
Kelly Adams
Andrew Forbes
Jon House
Johnny Phillips
Matt King
James Lance

The life and times of Michael Peterson AKA Charles Bronson (Hardy). No, not THE Charles Bronson, star of such classics as Once Upon a Time in the West, Hard Times, Death Wish and its way too many sequels, so on and so forth. We’re talking England’s most notorious prisoner. He takes on the Bronson moniker during one of his rare stints in the free world as his underground street-fighting name and it sticks. True story. Really, this is based on a true story.

So far in his life, Charlie has spent 34 years in prison. We’re told that 30 of them have been spent in solitary confinement. His crimes on the outside hardly warrant such lengthy incarceration. What happens on the inside is what extends his stay. Those fo you familiar with sports radio and TV host Jim Rome will recognize the label “likes to fight guy.” That describes Bronson to a tee. He simply loves fighting. Often, he fights groups of prison guards all at once. Whenever he knows its about to go down, he gets naked and slathers himself in some sort of cream for some unexplained reason. Just as well, I’m not sure I really want to know why. Sometimes, Bronson fights other inmates because that’s the only way he knows to deal with a situation. He even kills one poor guy simply to get moved to a different facility. The scenes depicting all these fights are realistically brutal. As he should since he’s usually taking on half a dozen guys or more, Charlie ends up bloody and beaten on more than a couple occasions. Saying that he’s a hard-headed fellow is a massive understatement.

Bronson tells the story from its subject’s completely unapologetic point of view. It doesn’t try to present him as some sort of misunderstood soul. It barely falls shy of glorifying his lifestyle. What makes it an odd biopic is that it flat out refuses to analyze him or speculate on what made him that way. As a result, we simply watch him move from one act of violence to the next until 90 or so minutes pass and the credits roll. It feels like a pointless exercise. At the risk of spoiling it, I’ll put it this way: he doesn’t learn a lesson, get the girl or save the day. We don’t sympathize with or gain a deeper understanding of him and we don’t learn a lesson, either.

If there is a method to the madness, it is to take aim at and skewer the culture that makes celebrities of anyone willing to make a fool of themselves in public. We see it in Charlie’s monologues delivered on a stage during which he basks in the glory of his fame as his country’s most dangerous inmate. The problem is, the movie seems to strain to make a point and doesn’t quite do it effectively.

As pointless excercises go, this is an excellent one. The simple fact of the matter is that Tom Hardy is amazing in the title role. He gives a mesmerizing performance. He makes Bronson, both the character and the movie something you just can’t take your eyes off.

MY SCORE: 7.5/10

It's Alive

Directed by Josef Rusnak.
2008. Rated R, 80 minutes.
Cast:
Bijou Phillips
James Murray
Raphaël Coleman
Owen Teale
Ty Glaser
Jack Ellis
Todd Jensen
Laura Giosh

Lenore (Phillips) is about to be a mom for the first time. Unfortunately, her little bundle of joy has some strange prenatal complications that force an emergency c-section. The doctors give momma some knockout gas, snatch junior from the womb and bada-boom, bada-bing, everyone in the delivery room ends up all sorts of dead, except for the new mom and her bouncing baby boy.

The police investigate and logically settle on Lenore as the prime suspect. Meanwhile, the rugrat is developing at an unprecedented rate. Within a day or so, he’s flipping over by himself, crawling shortly after that and devouring whatever small animals he can get his hands on. At his regular feeding time, he flat out abuses mom’s boobs. That pisses me off. What kind of godless creature would hurt a breast? Doesn’t he know we’re supposed to save the ta-tas? Oh…sorry for going off on that little tangent.

Anyhoo, small animals aren’t always enough to satisfy the little monster. This means when people show up at the house, they tend to end up victims of a gruesome homicide. Slowly, but surely mom becomes flat out hysterical about the whole thing. Oh yeah, I haven’t even mentioned dad yet, have I? He’s completely oblivious to what’s going on for most of the movie. Sure, he’s a doting father when he’s home, so proud that “something so beautiful came from us.” Those are his words, not mine. Then again, he’s not home much during the day when the little one is doing most of his terrorizing because hey, somebody’s gotta pay bills around there. And like any good housewife, the little lady makes sure to clean up and put away the corpses before her man gets home. Nope, he doesn’t notice the teeth marks all over his wife’s chest. C’mon, you know new dads don’t get any. Mom is too busy with the baby.

Why is this happening? There’s actually a very clever reason which I won’t spoil. So clever is it, an argument can be made that it is either pro-life or pro-choice. There’s also an interesting ending.

It’s Alive is an interesting flick. It works best when you can barely see the baby, if at all. It’s like the Star Wars series with regards to Yoda fighting. The thought of it was awesome, but when we actually saw it, it was rather silly. The same applies here, except for the one close-up we get of the baby near the end, a very nice jump-scare. It plays like a dumbed down sequel to Rosemary’s Baby. It’s actually a remake of the 1974 cult classic, also named It’s Alive. And finally, it’s so bad, it’s awesome!

MY SCORE: -10/10

The Orphanage

Directed by Juan Antonio Bayona.
2008. Rated R, 105 minutes.
Cast:
Belen Rueda
Fernando Cayo
Roger Princep
Mabel Rivera

Plot: Laura (Rueda) is a former orphan who now has an adopted son of her own, Simon (Princep). Together, with her husband Carlos (Cayo), they now live in a mansion that happens to have once been the orphanage where Laura spent much of her childhood. Simon seems to have lots of imaginary friends. When Simon goes missing, Laura suspects these "friends."

The Good: Director Juan Antonio Bayona shows great restraint. It would've been easy to ramp up the horror angles of the story and throw lots of cheap thrills on the screen. Instead, he focuses more on Laura's loosening grip on reality and the effect of Simon's disappearance on her and Carlos' relationship. This makes it a creepier film and adds power to its ending. To pull this off, Bayona needed a really strong performance out of lead actress Belen Rueda and he got it.

The Bad: The movie moves a bit too slow, dragging in places. Husband Carlos is not involved enough in the proceedings. He gets to a point we expect him to but he seems to get there too easily. It's almost like it's not really "that" big a deal to him Simon is missing. People that go into this expecting a straight horror flick might be disappointed.

The Ugly: Carlos tries to give someone in need mouth-to-mouth...but...um...half their mouth is missing.

Recommendation: This is a solid supernatural flick. It's got a creepy vibe to it and actually feels like a mix of Poltergeist and 1408. It's a little slow in spots but its ending makes up for it. It's probably the best horror movie of 2008. Warning to subtitleophobes: This one is "presented by" (I hate that term in movies) Pan's Labyrinth director Guillermo del Toro and like that one is in Spanish.

The Opposite View: Ben Kenigsberg, Time Out New York

What the Internet Says: 7.7/10 on imdb.com (10/20/10), 86% on rottentomatoes.com, 74/100 on metacritic.com

MY SCORE: 7/10

Prom Night (2008)

Directed by Nelson McCormick.
2008. Rated PG-13, 88 minutes.
Cast:
Brittany Snow
Idris Elba
Dana Davis
Johnathon Schaech

Several years earlier, Donna's (Snow) entire family was murdered by a high school teacher (Schaech) who became obsessed with her. Now, on her prom night he has escaped from prison and shows up as an uninvited guest to the big event. This is a remake of the 1980 movie starring Jamie Lee Curtis. Sort of. The acting is actually pretty good for the genre by the pre-requisitely gorgeous cast. The movie as a whole is a shiny, good looking affair. It's actually too shiny. Slasher flicks should resemble the dingy things with frayed edges that hide deep within your dresser drawers. This movie has the pristine look of, well, a prom dress. Still, it manages to build a decent amount of tension through a number of false scares. However, this can't overcome the hack job of a script that renders this nothing more than a paint-by-numbers dead teenager movie. That wouldn't be so bad but by making it PG-13, the blood and guts people watch these movies for are almost completely absent.

Real Movie Score: 3.5/10

Slasher Movie Score: 5.5/10

Man on Wire

Directed by James Marsh.
2008. Rated R, 94 minutes.
Cast:
Philippe Petit
Jean François Heckel
Jean-Louis Blondeau
Annie Allix
David Forman
Barry Greenhouse
Alan Welner
Mark Lewis

Philippe Petit is crazy. That’s it. No other explanation will reconcile my brain with what I saw, what he did. In my wildest dreams, my most imaginative moments, I’m the richest, most powerful, most famous man in the world capable of athletic feats and romantic endurance only the gods can rival. Even then, what he did is as far from my mind as a speck of dust falling harmlessly to the floor one million light years away. Insanity must be the only portal through which one not only arrives at the idea Philippe did, but to make it a reality.

Apparently, insanity is also contagious. If it isn't, there is no possible way our hero could've enlisted seemingly rational people to bring this particular dream to fruition, even if they were full of reckless abandon and youthful exuberance. Yet, his dream became theirs. They willfully participated in what could easily have been his cause of death.

Oh, I haven’t told you what Philippe did that has given me such cause to pause. He has only done one of the most amazing things any human being can claim as gospel truth. Way back in 1974, long before the Twin Towers at the World Trade Center became the site of a national tragedy and effectively the genesis of a lengthy war, they were a brand spanking new symbol of America’s prosperity. Two buildings, about two hundred feet apart, each standing 110 stories, became one of the signature landmarks of the iconic New York skyline. This fool, for lack of a better description, and his friends miraculously managed to rig a tightrope from one roof to the other which Philippe, timidly at first, then brazenly, walked and danced back and forth across for about 45 minutes. This is a documentary of just how this event came to be.

I call him a fool because it was a foolish act. The fact is, the only way to describe his feat, and this movie, is to resort to a well-worn cliché: it is a triumph of the human spirit. No doubt, Philippe’s quirky, not quite all there personality and obvious zest for life makes the stories of planning and carrying out of his moment at the top of the world into compelling drama. Those same traits were instrumental in convincing people to go along with his cockamamie idea. There is also a love story and similarly flavored friendships that help ground the narration. They keep us from forgetting that this was nothing to be taken lightly, but something that could've turned out in a dreadfully different manner.

By the end, we feel as some of the eyewitness and participants feel. The magic of Philippe’s act overwhelms us. We can’t help but feel exhilarated. It is during this part of the film that contains the most poignant moment. We see footage from a local New York newscast the evening following the event. One of the police officers who arrested Philippe (you knew this was illegal, right?) is being interviewed. We can clearly see he’s a man torn between admonishing someone for breaking the law and admiring the same person for providing him with the most incredible sight of his or most anyone else’s life. We hear the tremble in his voice, see the tears welling up. How they don’t come tumbling down his cheeks is an act of willpower that might be worthy of its own film.

The big moment is tainted just a little, but only very little. All through the movie there is plenty of old footage from Philippe’s home videos mixed with some dramatizations. However, of the walk itself, there are only still shots. They’re still unbelievably amazing, but I was hoping to catch a glance or two of our hero in motion during the apex of his existence.

In the end, it’s just a beautifully done documentary of something most of us couldn’t even fathom trying. It’s also a much more positive light through which we can remember the Twin Towers. Philippe, and the movie, are refreshingly free from politics, sad reminscing or even mentioning the fate of the great buildings. Instead, we watch a man, and the people who helped him, fondly remember the time when he played on the world’s largest jungle gym.

The Opposite View: Noel Murray, The Onion (A.V. Club)

What the Internet Says: 8.0/10 on imdb.com (9/29/10), 100% on rottentomatoes.com, 89/100 on metacritic.com

MY SCORE: 10/10