The Great Buck Howard

Directed by Sean McGinly.

2009. Rated PG, 90 minutes.
Cast:
John Malkovich
Colin Hanks
Emily Blunt
Ricky Jay
Steve Zahn
Adam Scott
Debra Monk
Tom Hanks
Matthew Gray Gubler

Mentalist Buck Howard (Malkovich) makes his living performing effects in small, dingy, rundown, half empty theaters all across the nation. He seems to think he’s a bigger star than he actually is. Once upon a time, he really was a big deal. As he’s quick to tell you, he appeared 61 times on “The Tonight Show” with Johnny Carson. He stresses the fact that it was with Carson and not Leno, whom he despises. He also stresses he’s a mentalist, not a magician. He despises them, also. If you couldn’t tell, Buck is rather insufferable. He’s arrogant, bossy and quick-tempered. Because he is “The Great” Buck Howard, we are somehow beneath him.

Young Troy Gable (Colin Hanks) has just dropped out of law school. He only went because it was his father’s dream for him. His father is played in a small role by Colin’s real life and more famous dad Tom Hanks. Law school made Troy miserable, so he’s trying to find his own way in life.

Troy gets hired to be Buck’s new road manager. The guy he’s replacing is supposed to train him but refuses after a big blowup with Buck. Along with Troy, we learn that big blowups are an almost daily occurrence in Buck’s world.

John Malkovich plays the role perfectly. We can see the patience for us mere mortals leaving his face when things aren’t going exactly according to plan. This, combined with the near constant ravings of a disillusioned man creates tension and comedy. Perhaps the best example of this is when one of his adoring fans (he does, in fact, have a loyal following) who happens to run one of the theaters he plays decides to do an impromptu introduction of him instead of using his pre-taped one. His reaction is priceless. He makes the movie fun to watch.

Despite all this, The Great Buck Howard is hardly about Buck Howard. It’s more about Troy and the lesson Buck teaches him. Thankfully, it does a good job of making us wait for that lesson. It also manages to transform the unlikeable Buck into a sympathetic figure. By the way, for fans of magicians…er…mentalists, Buck is loosely based on The Amazing Kreskin (google is your friend, here).

It’s not a comedy for most of the Hot Tub Time Machine crowd, but it is funny. The story is told well and provides us with plenty of ups and downs. Every time it seems he’s set things up perfectly to get his next big break, something goes wrong. Almost everytime, but I’ll say no more. Best of all and perhaps key to Buck as a character, try as we might, we never find out just how Buck Howard manages to be so great.

MY SCORE: 7.5/10

Invictus

Directed by Clint Eastwood.

2009. Rated PG-13, 133 minutes.
Cast:
Morgan Freeman
Matt Damon
Tony Kgoroge
Patrick Mofokeng
Matt Stern
Julian Lewis Jones
Marguerite Wheatley
Patrick Lyster
McNeil Hendricks

Newly elected South African president Nelson Mandela (Freeman) attempts to use the country’s rugby team to forge national unity in the days shortly after apartheid has ended; based on a true story.

Once again, Clint Eastwood proves you don’t need extensive fireworks to keep the audience engaged. He gives us his normal patient storytelling. Though nothing much happens in the way of action until the big game at the end, we don’t get bored. Instead, we’re fascinated by the picture being painted before us. It helps that Morgan Freeman turns in a splendid performance as Mandela. In him, we see a leader doing what he thinks is best for his country despite the fact he’s alone in his thinking.

There is no shortage of sports movie clichés. Long story short, and I don’t think I’m really spoiling anything here: an underdog team gets their act together. Think of all the movies you’ve already seen with that theme and you get the idea. It also gets to be repetitive. The typical cycle goes something like this: we see some dissention or doubt cast on what Mandela’s doing. Somehow word gets back to him and he pops up wherever the problem is and says a few magic words and everyone falls in line.

It’s a movie that manages to be good in spite of itself. Genre clichés and Mandela’s almost mystical presence threatens to overwhelm, but they never quite ruin things. It just becomes precisely what it wants to be, a feel good movie. This means that while there are reasons to knock it, it eventually wins you over.

MY SCORE: 7/10

The Men Who Stare at Goats

Directed by Grant Heslov.

2009. Rated R, 94 minutes.
Cast:
George Clooney
Ewan McGregor
Jeff Bridges
Kevin Spacey
Stephen Lang
Robert Patrick
Waleed Zuaiter
Nick Offerman

Reporter Bob Wilton (McGregor) follows Lyn Cassady (Clooney) around the Middle East in hopes of writing an exposé about a secret military program to train soldiers with paranormal abilities. As the movie itself tells us, “more of this is true than you would believe.”

Clooney gives us another of his quirky, paranoid performances. Think O Brother, Where Art Thou? It’s one of the two types of roles he’s perfected, the ultra suave cynic being the other. He knows how to work us with excellent comic timing. Most of the movie’s best moments are his. The rest belong to Jeff Bridges who lets us know what The Dude from The Big Lebowski would be like as a soldier.

It wants to be a great oddball comedy. It’s definitely oddball but not consistently funny enough to keep us from noticing just how silly all this is, even though we’re not laughing. Ewan McGregor turns rather bland work. Part of the problem is he shares so much screentime with Clooney he never gets a chance to shine despite the movie being about his character. Finally, Kevin Spacey is underused as our villain if, for no other reason than it’s Kevin Spacey. Forgive me, I’m all about some Spacey.

It’s a premise with loads of potential that just doesn’t quite hit the mark. Unfortunately, even if it had it still may have been too strange for some.

MY SCORE: 5.5/10

The Fourth Kind

Directed by Olatunde Osunsanmi.
2009. Rated PG-13, 98 minutes.
Cast:
Milla Jovovich
Will Patton
Hakeem Kae-Kazim
Elias Koteas
Raphael Coleman
Mia Mckenna-Bruce
Eric Loren
Corey Johnson
Enzo Cilenti
Daphne Alexander

Dr. Abigail Tyler (Jovovich…and the actual Dr. Tyler) suspects that the abnormal amount of unexplained disappearances in Nome, Alaska are due to alien abductions. This is supposedly based on “actual case studies” and interviews with Dr. Tyler.

It’s a fascinating subject. Though many of the dramatic events can’t quite be called evidence, they are compelling side-effects, allegedly. During these scenes, the energy level is ramped up and much of what we see is disturbing. Will Patton gives us the film’s best performance as Sheriff August. His skepticism grounds the movie, keeping it from completely coming apart at the seams.

Director Olatunde Osunsanmi made a decision that absolutely sinks his movie. He tries to make a documentary and a dramatization about the same story, simultaneously. We’re often shown video footage, reportedly of actual events, alongside scenes of actors re-enacting the exact same occurrences in split-screen. It’s a distracting style in which each half of the screen subtracts from the other. Why do we need Milla Jovovich when we have the real Dr. Tyler? Instead of being taken in, maybe even persuaded by what’s going on, we’re busy picking out differences in the actor’s performance and the real thing. Incidentally, this is why I believe Will Patton’s performance is the movie’s best. His is one of the few not repeatedly juxtaposed with the genuine article. The bottom line is this should’ve been either a documentary or a dramatization, not both.

If you’re a conspiracy theorist who not only believes in alien abductions but also that the government is going out of its way to cover them up, you will find plenty of fodder for your cannon, here. The “actual” footage we see is interesting, though some of it is of questionable validity. It suddenly becomes too grainy or otherwise unwatchable at appropriate moments. However, the style makes it a frustrating watch. We can never get settled into what we’re watching and therefore can’t feel the horror it wants us to. Nor can we reach the conclusion it wants us to. Nothing here will change your mind, one way or another.

MY SCORE: 4/10

Thirst

Directed by Chan-wook Park

2009. Rated R, 133 minutes.
Cast:
Kung-ho Song
Ok-bin Kim
Hae-sook Kim
Ha-kyun Shin
In-hwan Park
Dal-su Oh
Young-chang Song

Sang-hyun (Kang-ho Song) is a priest who volunteers for a medical experiment in hopes of helping to find a cure for the fatal Emmanuel Virus. The experiment fails and infects him with the disease. An emergency blood transfusion saves his life but transforms him into a vampire. Director Chan-Wook’s gifts for telling twisted tales is on full display, here. The film never rushes, letting the story and the characters develop. As it becomes creepier and more incredible it slides in the story of a love forbidden in more ways than one. As the object of our priest’s desire Tae-ju, Ok-bin Kim is simply fantastic and steals every scene starting with the first time we meet her. The script calls for her to go from a stereotypically meek Asian housewife, albeit one not particularly in love with her husband, to domineering and bloodthirsty. She is perfect every step of the way and really adds “umph” to the bittersweet ending. Finally, the movie is beautifully shot. Like the best of Chan-Wook, it’s almost like looking at a series of elegant still shots occasionally splattered with magnificent gushes of blood.

Where did this vampiric blood come from? The priest wonders the same, aloud, once or twice but that’s all we get. The simple fact of his infection implies there are more vampires out there but we never see any. Showing us one, or more, could have set up an intriguing battle of good and evil, further tormenting our reluctant bloodsucker. The movie’s meticulous storytelling draws us into a fantastic world and works hard to ensure our suspension of disbelief. The problem is we’re snapped back to reality by some shoddy cgi whenever our vampires are shown performing great feats from a distance. It’s more than a bit jarring, especially considering there are shots of the priest jumping from a building with the camera really close to him that work much better.

It’s a wonderfully twisted entry into the vampire canon. Park Chan-Wook delivers another masterpiece of the macabre. Though there is plenty of disturbing imagery and somewhat masochistic sex, both help tell the story and don’t feel gratuitous. This makes it a decidedly adult venture into the world of the undead. That means while it is a love story involving vampires, don’t bother if you’re in the Twilight target audience. If you do, bring your reading glasses unless you’re fluent in Korean.

The Cove

Directed by Louie Psihoyos.
2009. Rated PG-13, 92 minutes.
Cast:
Richard O’Barry
Louie Psihoyos
Hardy Jones
Michael Illif
Paul Watson
Doug DeMaster
Ian Campbell
Joji Morishita
Charles Hambleton

Tahji, Japan has a dark secret. What’s known is that this small town is the world’s leading supplier of dolphins to aquariums and theme parks. Large schools of them are herded into a small area just off the shore where dolphin trainers from all over the globe pick out the ones they want. Dolphins sell for up to $150,000 each. Another part of the process has been kept under wraps. The dolphins not lucky enough to be purchased are moved to a secluded area and blatantly slaughtered for their meat. That meat is then packaged, often purposely mislabeled and sold. The problem with selling it is that it is highly toxic and should not be consumed by humans. It is estimated that 23,000 dolphins lose their lives each year in “the cove”.

The man who has tasked himself with bringing these horrors to an end is Ric O’Barry. A lifetime ago, he actually helped capture and train the dolphins that performed on the TV series “Flipper”. The success of that show created an international market for dolphins. It’s a market he’s now dedicated his life to shutting down. He has enlisted the help of a team of like-minded, but younger activist to expose Tahji’s secret to the world.

Simply put, The Cove is one of the more powerful documentaries you’ll ever see. It does a magnificient job of transferring its own sense of responsibility onto the viewer. Therefore, even though it is one-sided, we applaud. That’s because the other side is an affront to our humanity and feels cruel merely for the sake of being cruel. It also injects some spy-movie goodness into the proceedings. These moments bring us to the edge of our seats the same way our favorite action flicks might. When the movie is over we feel both good and bad. We’ve found triumph in a tragedy, but also tragedy in a triumph.

MY SCORE: 10/10

How to Be a Serial Killer

Directed by Luke Ricci.
2009. Rated R, 88 minutes.
Cast:
Dameon Clarke
Matthew Gray Gubler
Laura Regan
George Wyner

Mike Wilson (Clarke) is a serial killer and proud of it. So much so, he doesn’t mind sharing his knowledge of the ins and outs of recreational murder. While perusing the aisles at the local video store he meets Bart (Gubler) who works there. When he sees Bart getting berated by a customer, Mike decides to help out the best way he knows. A short while later, the rude patron is dead and Mike takes Bart on as his protégé.

Bart asks tons of questions while tagging along on Mike’s excursions and Mike is only too happy to share. He answers his trainee’s inquiries in two ways. The first is simply him answering in the most obvious way: face to face. The other way is more geared towards us, the viewers. To this end, the movie is broken up into 10 lessons. Each lesson is given by Mike standing on a stage. Stylistically, this is a straight rip from Bronson, another movie about a career criminal. However, just like it does there, it works. After his little spiel, we switch back to “the real world”.

Speaking of “The Real World,” we’ve arrived at my chief gripe with this movie. Ever since that show first became a hit on MTV roughly two decades ago television, particularly reality TV has been littered with people speaking directly to the camera about their feelings on what we’ve just seen or what we are about to see. How to Be a Serial Killer utilizes this tactic, as well. It’s a tired gimmick that only serves to repeatedly stop the flow of what is otherwise a morbidly enjoyable dark comedy.

Thankfully, through it all we have the gleefully insane performance of Dameon Clarke in the lead role. His character is not one we should like, but has a personality we’re drawn to. Clarke balances this very nicely. Of course, since it looks like the whold movie was made for roughly five bucks and very few of us know anyone who’s even heard of it, his work has gone completely unnoticed. As Bart, Gubler holds his own and has managed bigger and better things in his career (he plays on TV’s “Criminal Minds”). The two of them, plus the Herculean effort their characters put forth to keep all this a secret from Mike’s girlfriend Abigail (Regan) keeps us intrigued. The movie has its shortcomings, but it’s still low-budget, twisted fun.

Chloe

Directed by Atom Egoyan.
2009. Rated R, 96 minutes.
Cast:
Amanda Seyfried
Julianne Moore
Liam Neeson
Max Thierot
R. H. Thompson
Nina Dobrev
Mishu Vellani
Meghan Heffern

David (Neeson) is a college professor who often travels for speaking engagements. None too pleased about getting older, he purposely skips out on a flight home so he doesn’t have to celebrate his birthday with his wife Catherine (Moore). She, of course, has thrown him a surprise party. Guss who’s surprised. She figures out he went to dinner with some young, pretty co-eds. Combine this with his flirtations nature and the fact he likes to keep up with his students through IMs and texts and the wife realizes she might not be in a monogamous relationship. It doesn’t help that hubby is pretty secretive about the e-conversations he’s carrying on. Then, there is the couple’s son Michael. He’s an ingrate who despises his mom for reasons only known to him. He ignores her rules, including having his girlfriend sleep over. Really, he just ignores her altogether. He only speaks to her when she confronts him. When this happens, it’s all profanity laced attitude coming from his mouth. By the way, mom is a highly successful doctor. Other than that, her existence is pretty miserable.

As luck would have it, Catherine meets Chloe (Seyfried) in a restaurant restroom. It turns out Chloe is a prostitute. She’s also about the same age as all those girls David shares his laughs with. Putting her newfound contact to use, she decides to hire Chloe to present herself to David as a student and see what happens. As for her Catherine’s relationship with her son, she does nothing but whine about it. Her real energy is focused on getting all the juicy details of her husband’s meetings with Chloe. From there, a Skinemax flick breaks out.

For the uninformed, Skinemax refers to the soft-core porn movies that cable network Cinemax became famous for in the 1990s. They mostly aired late at nigh, especially on Fridays and Saturdays. Do they still do this? I haven’t had the channel in years, but obviously I know way too much about this. Still, there is a point. Most of those flicks seems to rip off Fatal Attraction, Basic Instinct, or have a plot that is some sort of hybrid of the two. This one goes the Fatal Attraction route. Chloe does indeed turn out to be our psycho. Who she is fatally attracted to is a twist that’s not all that surprising. Titillating? Sure. Unexpected? Not really.

The problem is once Chloe’s nuttiness becomes evident, we can always guess her next move. We’ve seen this before. Most of the other movies we’ve watched like this, such as Obsessed and Basic Instinct 2 at least have the good sense to go so far over the top they’re teetering on the edge of the cliff. Those movies revel in their ridiculousness. They are really bad, but enjoyably so. Chloe tries to traverse a more “adult”, artsy-fartsy road. Sadly, it never escapes the shadow of its Skinemax roots. Julianne Moore is a fine actress. I’ve always enjoyed her work. However, her role here could’ve been played by one-time B-movie queen Shannon Whirry. Seyfried could’ve been replaced with any number of less talented but similarly attractive wannabes. Liam Neeson? Let’s just say his role doesn’t really require someone with the chops of Liam Neeson.

Like most of, if not all the movies Whirry actually starred in, there is a good deal of nudity. Also like those movies, the nudity is not there to accentuate the plot, but to grab attention away from a weak storyline. Seeing Moore and Seyfried in various stages of undress, often in the presence of one another, becomes the point of the movie instead of a part of it. The result is we have a wonderful cast doing their best to elevate material that can’t be lifted.

MY SCORE: 4/10

Get Low

Directed by Aaron Schneider.
2009. Rated PG-13, 100 minutes.
Cast:
Robert Duvall
Bill Murray
Sissy Spacek
Lucas Black
Bill Cobbs
Gerald McRaney
Scott Cooper
Lori Beth Edgeman
Andrea Powell

From time to time, children dare each other to knock on Felix Bush’s (Duvall) door. He’s the hermit that lives in a house way out in the woods. The unlucky ones shiver as they approach, uneasily making their way up the porch steps. The invariably take off running once they hear the cocking of a shotgun, whether they knock or not. Without fail, he fires a shot. Felix traps this one whogets a gander at his unkempt beard, wildly jutting from his face in every direction. This one also sees the crazed look in his eye and, of course, the shotgun. This is the man the boy has heard stories about. This is the man the boy has been told has killed and won’t hesitate to kill again. Felix lets the boy live. We get the sense that thes occasional run-ins are the only human contact the old man gets. Still, everyone in town seems to have a story to tell about him.

Felix says he wants to hear these stories. He also wants something a little more peculiar. He wants to hear them while attending his own funeral. In case you’re confused, he doesn’t want to wait until he’s dead for this. He wants to be alive and to invite anyone in town who wants to come and share their stories about him. He wants it to be party. Oh, this is inspired by a true story.

After discovering the hermit has a wad of money, funeral home owner Frank Quinn (Murray) proves to be just greedy enough and crazy enough to take the job. With the help of his young employee Buddy (Black), the two sell themselves as the right guys to make it happen. Soon, they discover this is no easy task. More importantly, they find out there’s a lot more to Mr. Bush than meets the eye.

Moving forward, it becomes questionable whether the trio can pull this thing off. It also becomes doubtful that Felix even wants to. His ulterior motives have stirred too many old emotions. Mr. Bush and Frank bicker, agree and disagree. To showcase this we get a pair of outstanding performances from Duvall and Murray. Though this can’t quite be labeled a comedy, their scenes together are fill with perfect comic timing. The jokes are sly, but effective.

Well before reaching the end, we realize this is the tale of a man seeking redemption on his own terms. From whom, or what, is not immediately clear. When it’s finally explained to us, we understand the pain that’s transformed him into the man everyone has a story about.

MY SCORE: 7.5/10

Mary and Max

Directed by Adam Elliot.
2009. Rated PG, 80 minutes.
Cast:
Toni Collette
Philip Seymour Hoffman
Eric Bana
Bethany Whitmore
Barry Humphries
Renée Geyer
Ian “Molly” Meldrum

Mary Daisy Dinkle (Whitmore/Collette) is an eight year old girl living in Australia in the 1970s and is often left to her own devices. She develops lots of hobbies, eats lots of condensed milk straight from the can and watches lots of her favorite show, “The Noblets.” Unfortunately, her mom is drunk most of the time, her dad is usually at working or enjoying his own hobbies in the shed and Mary has no other friends. To change this, she decides to get a pen pal. To decide who the lucky, unsuspecting person will be, she randomly picks a name out of a New York City phone book. That name is Max Horowitz. She eagerly writes the first letter and mails it off.

Max is 44 years old, lives alone in New York and in many ways, is child-like. Like Mary, he spends lots of time eating his favorite food, in his case chocolate, and watching “The Noblets.” He also attends “Overeaters Anonymous” meetings and plays the lottery ever day, always the same number. When he receives Mary’s letter he’s taken aback, at first. Soon, he musters enough courage to return the gesture.

The pair continue to exchange the letters for the next three decades, through all the ups and downs of their lives. This long distance relationship frames their existnces, eventually coming to define them. Through the letters, they get to know each other in ways most people don’t. They truly become friends. The welcome side-effect is that we get to know them intimately, as well. They become our friends. We’re happy when they’re happy. We hurt when they do. A key moment comes when we find out that Max indeed has a diagnosed mental disability. However, this isn’t revealed to draw our sympathy. The real value is showing what effect this has on Mary. The heights and depths of her adult life seem to all stem from knowledge of Max’s affliction.

The question we desperately want answered is will they ever meet face to face? How this plays out is a brilliant and touching piece of film making. It’s not something we arrive upon easily, either. It’s truly a moment many years in the making. If you’re prone to crying at movies, keep the tissue handy. If you’re looking for hyperkinetic action, toilet humor and talking animal sidekicks, you’re in the wrong place. If you want to see two fabulously intertwined character studies, stay.

Green Lantern: First Flight

Directed by Lauren Montgomery.
2009. Rated PG-13, 77 minutes.
Cast:
Christopher Meloni
Victor Garber
Tricia Helfer
Michael Madsen
John Laroquette
Kurtwood Smith
Larry Drake
Olivia d’Abo
Richard McGonagle

An alien crash-lands on Earth. Speaking to the very special ring he’s wearing, he tells it to go forth and find his successor. The ring picks pilot Hal Jordan (Meloni) and brings him to the fallen visitor. Just before the visitor passes away, he informs Hal that he is now a “Green Lantern,” one of the defenders of the universe. He also tells Hall that The Guardians will send for him. By the way, the rings gives him all sorts of powers and allows him to do pretty much whatever he can think of, including flying. The next day, four other Green Lanterns show up and whisk Hal off to another planet so The Guardians can evaluate him.

Hal is thrust into the middle of the investigation of the murder of Abin Sur (McGonagle), the guy that flew all the way to Earth to die. High ranking Lantern Sinestro (Garber) offers to take the earthling under his wing to “see what he’s made of.” Hal discovers Sinestro is a bit aggressive in his interrogations and feels handcuffed by The Guardians, limiting his abilities in cleaning up the universe. Hal is also informed that someone has stolen the precious Yellow Element which is the only thing that can overpower the Green Element that powers the Lanterns.

From there, we get a police procedural trying to ascertain the identity and whereabouts of the thief who’s taken the Yellow Element. It is made abundantly clear that whoever is responsible can, and certainly will try to gain control of the entire universe. With all of that on their collective plate, you can imagine the Lanterns get testy with one another from time to time. In particular, new guy Hal draws the most ire, basically because he’s the new guy.

Green Lantern: First Flight is solidly written and has some entertaining action scenes. Of course, the action really cranks up near the end as our villain and his cause become known. The problem is the movie goes against its own logic in order to achieve the prerequisite happy ending. It’s not a deal-breaker, but questions are easily raised.

Overall, this is a solid entry into the DC canon. It gives us an origin story without dragging us through all the years of Hal Jordan’s life prior to getting the ring. The twist in the investigation is spotted a bit too easily, but still leads us to a fun finale. The lingering question is, will the live-action version starring Ryan Reynolds as our hero be better or worse?

In the Loop

Directed by Armando Iannucci.
2009. Rated R, 106 minutes.
Cast:
Peter Capaldi
Tom Hollander
Gina McKee
James Gandolfini
Chris Addison
Anna Chlumsky
Paul Higgins
Mimi Kennedy
Alex Macqueen
Olivia Poulet
David Rasche

Plot: When British Minister for International Development, Simon Foster (Hollander), goes on record saying that war in the Middle East is "unforeseeable," he becomes a pawn in the game between the pro-war and anti-war factions of the U.S. government. Based on the BBC sitcom The Thick of It.

The Good: The script is magnificently clever, and funny. It is political satire of the highest order. It thrives on organized chaos and showcases people who aren't quite as smart as they think they are. There is also the constant jockeying for position by people with power. All of this is tied together by the uniformly brilliant performances of the cast. In particular, Peter Capaldi as potty-mouthed aid to the British Prime Minister Malcolm Tucker is relentlessly hilarious. His is one of 2009's best and most overlooked performances.

The Bad: It satirizes events from the months leading up to the US and UK officially involving themselves as allies in war in the Middle East in 2003. In a world where the news cycle is ridiculously fast, it can feel dated from time to time. Like most satire, it is occasionally too smart for its own good. As a result, it limits its own audience to those who rebel against what pops up in the multiplexes.

The Ugly: Any one of Malcolm's expletive-filled tirades.

Recommendation: The movie ItL has been most compared to is the Stanley Kubrick classic Dr. Strangelove. Honestly, I'm not a big fan of that movie, but I am of this one. If you're looking for a political satire, grab this. Steer clear if you think Pineapple Express is the height comedy.

MY SCORE: 9/10

The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest

Directed by Daniel Alfredson.
2009. Rated R, 147 minutes, Swedish.
Cast:
Noomi Rapace
Michael Nyqvist
Lena Endre
Annika Hallin
Anders Ahlbom
Micke Spreitz
Georgi Staykov

After playing with fire, the girl with the dragon tattoo kicks the hornet’s nest. The hornet’s nest is really a super secret organization of cranky elderly dudes clinging to life with brittle, spotted hands. As gathered from the prior movie in the series, these guys protect our heroine’s father, a lunatic Soviet defector as a matter of national security. In an effort to maintain that secrecy, they actually do everything they possibly can to out themselves. Nice goin’, fellas.

Evidently, the one thing our bad guys believe will ensure that they remain safely in the shadows is locking up “the girl,” Lisbeth Salander (Rapace). Following the events of The Girl Who Played with Fire, she opens chapter three in a hospital bed after having a few bullets dug out of her. She’s also still wanted for three murders and now the attempted murder of dear old, psychopathic dad. “The Section,” as our wannabe clandestine and very grumpy old men come to be known, are trying to see to it that she’s convicted of these crimes. Meanwhile, super reporter Mikael Blomkvist (Nyqvist) attempts to ride to her rescue. He even guilts his sister (Hallin) into taking the case pro-bono.

The problems with this installment of the Millenium trilogy quickly come into focus. Here, we have a movie about a character who, over the course of two previous movies, has already proven she can be endlessly compelling. However, she’s not nearly as watchable when given nothing to do. She spends the first half of the movie confined to her hospital room while others work on her behalf. The latter half, she’s either sitting in a courtroom, or jail cell. In lieu of all the activity and intrigue of its predecessors, Hornet’s Nest treats us to long stretches of Lisbeth refusing to speak.

What we’re left with is a less than thrilling spy flick. Blomkvist is constantly chasing sources, or trying to get information to Lisbeth. The old guys make and botch plans. The gigantic blonde guy, whom we found out in Fire is Lisbeth’s half-brother, roams the countryside much like Frankenstein’s monster. For some unexplained reason, he’s kidnapped some woman, throws her out of a moving car and apparently goes back for her because he has her again, later. At least, I think it’s the same woman. Either way, it doesn’t matter because she just as inexplicably disappears. Sadly, none of this is particularly exciting to watch.

Viewing Hornet’s Nest becomes tedious work. The main culprit is something that happens way back in the first movie that we’ve never been allowed to forget for even one second. It provides us with such an overwhelming clue about how this is going to play out we’re simply waiting for it to be presented. Once it is, it can’t help be anything but anti-climactic.

Hornet’s Nest is a wasted opportunity. The promise was there for this to complete a great saga and catapult this franchise into the same stratosphere as some of the great cinematic trilogies. Instead of going out in a blaze of glory, it ends in a resounding thud. After two wonderful thrillers, we get a hybrid espionage/courtroom drama that’s not good at either. In the mean time, it’s best character, the one who’s fate hangs in the balance is pretty much made to go to her room like a child waiting for her parents to come to a decision about what punishment is to be handed out. Because of this, the movie drags and then reaches a conclusion we already figured out about ten minutes in. Imagine going to a basketball game, watching your favorite player drop 50 in the first three quarters and then be benched for the entire fourth quarter even though the game is still a close one. That’s the feeling this one gave me.

MY SCORE: 4.5/10

World's Greatest Dad

Directed by Bobcat Goldthwait.

2009. Rated R, 99 minutes.
Cast:
Robin Williams
Alexie Gilmore
Daryl Sabara
Henry Simmons
Geoff Pierson
Evan Martin
Lorraine Nicholson
Zach Sanchez

Plot: Aspiring but unsuccessful writer and high school poetry teacher Lance Clayton (Williams) lives alone with his unapologetic jerk of a teenaged son Kyle (Sabara) and carries on a relationship with fellow teacher Claire (Gilmore) even though she doesn't want to be seen in public with him.

The Good: Robin Williams is usually only seen in two modes. He's either zany, verging on being totally out of control but fighting for some grand cause or morose and perhaps more than a little perverted. Here, he's much more a regular guy who seems to have life living him, instead of the other way around. He pulls it off, perfectly. Like so many of us in real life, his emotions are conveyed not by his words but by his facial expressions and body language. It's a wonderful performance. To aid this, we get a story that's excellently written. It's subtle, even when it seems to be over the top. It also puts us in position to seriously ponder what we might've done in the same situation. This brings us to the writer and director, Bobcat Goldthwait, who also shows up in a tiny role. Those of us who can actually remember the 1980s might be mildly surprised he hasn't already died of an overdose. Given that you might be completely blown away that he's still capable of coherent thought, much less writing a cerebral character examination. Kudos to him. Oh, I haven't even mentioned the fact that it's funny.

The Bad: Where is Kyle's mother? Unless I missed it, she's never mentioned. Doing so would've added another layer to both Kyle and the movie as a whole. We would be better able to psychoanalyze him, as we're already doing without quite enough information. I would have also love for us to meet Andrew's (Martin) mom, the alcoholic. She could've added tons, as well.

The Ugly: How and why the tragedy occurred.

Recommendation: We have another excellent effort in dark comedy, making 2009 a very strong year for the genre. As with most of them, there's just not enough hijinks and shenanigans to hold some people's attention. If you don't go in expecting another gross-out bromance or get too pissed off in the first few minutes that Lance hasn't beat the crap out of his son, you'll be in for a fun ride. Those of you into character studies, this one's for you.

MY SCORE: 8/10

The White Ribbon

Directed by Michael Haneke.
2009. Rated R, 144 minutes, German.
Cast:
Christian Friedel
Ernst Jacobi
Leonie Benesch
Ulrich Tukur
Ursina Lardi
Fion Mutert
Michael Kranz
Burghart Klaussner
Maria-Victoria Dragus
Leonard Proxauf

The village doctor has a serious accident on his way home, one day. Someone used a very strong, thin and barely visible wire tied between two trees to trip the horse he was riding on. Yes, I said horse. Our movie begins about 1916, if my math is right. We’re not explicitly told. Anyhoo, the doc breaks his collarbone and is off to the nearest hospital and out of sight for roughly half the movie. This is first in a series of bizarre occurrences in the village. For most of these events, the culprit is unknown. Whodunit becomes the question that dominates the landscape.

Between the strange, heinous crimes, we get to know the villagers. The local school teacher serves as our narrator. In true early 20th century fashion, he’s courting a 17 year old girl with intentions to marry her. There is the rich baron who employs half the town. No one in town really likes him, but hey, he’s the boss. We have the poor family who lost their matriarch to a work accident. Since she worked for the baron, some of them blame him for her demise. The doctor’s next door neighbor takes care of his kids while he’s in the hospital. There’s more to her than that, but I don’t want to spoil it. The town reverend is a crusty Old Testament type who doles out punishment to his children in biblical proportions for their indiscretions.

Speaking of punishment, it is at the center of all things in TWR. There is always some act or another deemed worthy of penalty. Those penalties include lashings, mandatory ribbon wearing, being tied up every night and termination from employment, to name a few. The victims of the seemingly random crimes appear to be being punished, too. For what, isn’t always clear. As who is responsible comes into focus, it raises other questions.

When the end credits begin to roll, an entire way of life has been put on trial. Are the various methods of punishment effective or excessive? Are the misdeeds real or perceived? Is Christianity, or religion in general, too rigid? How does all this effect the children? There is much to discuss.

Aside from the questions it raises, the movie itselfe is an intriguing mystery. It is also packed with family drama revealing various levels of dysfunction within the families of the village. However, it is also slow. Most, if not all of the punishing takes place off-screen. We merely watch them talk about it, and they speak very calmly. Though the dialogue they deliver while almost never raising their voices is exceptionally written, I can see this being a difficult watch for many.

My Bloody Valentine 3D

Directed by Patrick Lussier.
2009. Rated R, 107 minutes.
Cast:
Jensen Ackles
Jaime King
Kerr Smith
Edi Gathegi

Plot: A Valentine's Day accident kills a number of miners and puts the lone survivor, Harry Warden, into a coma. Exactly one year later, Harry wakes up and kills pretty much everyone in the hospital. Ten years following that, people start turning up dead again as the romantic holiday approaches.

The Good: It gives you what you came for. You watch a movie like this mainly to see people getting mutilated by a homicidal maniac. This film knows its audience and wisely panders to it. Our boogeyman shoves his pick-axe through the crown of a head, the back of another, through someone's abdomen...you get the picture. The story is also just suspenseful enough to keep things interesting and even handles its twist better than the original. Finally, having the movie in 3D is an added treat for fans.

The Bad: The bad dialogue is pretty much par for the slasher flck course but it lacks the humor of the original. Its intent on creating a menacing atmosphere, which it does, but it takes itself a little too seriously. Also, the national media element of the story should've been cut completely out of the picture. Its introduced like its going to play a major role. If it does, it would've been too much like Scream. Since it doesn't, it feels like a loose end.

The Ugly: The eyeball coming at ya in 3D.

Recommendation: For fans of the genre, this is a must-see. It improves upon the original in nearly every aspect. And its in 3D so the blood-splattering goodness comes right at you. If you're not a fan of these types of movies, the story isn't quite compelling enough for you to make an exception, you'll never get passed the blood and guts. For us sadistic types who love a good meat grinder, its right up our alley.

REAL MOVIE SCORE: 5.5/10

SLASHER FLICK SCORE: 8.5/10

Mother

Directed by Joon-Ho Bong.
2009. Rated R, 128 minutes, Korean.
Cast:
Hye-ja Kim
Bin Won
Ku Jin
Je-mun Yun
Mi-sun Jun
Sae-Byeok Song
Gin-goo Kim

A young woman with a tawdry reputation turns up dead and draped over the edge of a building’s roof. In very short order, the police decide that Do-Joon (Won) is the guilty party. Since we’ve already met him, we don’t think he’s capable of such a thing. He has some undefined mental disability which severely hampers his memory. It also renders him socially immature. Autism, maybe? He appears to be fairly harmless. His mother (Hye-ja Kim), whom he lives with, agrees with this assessment and takes to the streets to do what O. J. Simpson vowed so many years ago: find the real killer.

Mom soon finds herself in all sorts of dangerous positions, dealing with shady characters and getting no cooperation from the cops who insist they have the right person. Regardless of the risks she must take or the potential futility of her quest, she drives on, undeterred.

This sounds like a pretty typical murder mystery where someone close to the accused takes up their cause and tries to find who’s really responsible. It’s more than that. In fact, by the time we reach the end, the crime’s perpertrator is of secondary importance. Of primary concern is the unfolding of a mother’s relationship with her son. A revelation late in the movie surprises, possibly even upsets us. Though its something she already knew, how this is brought to the surface surprises and upsets her, also. An action she takes later not only gives herself those same feelings, it irrevocably changes her. For us, our perception of her changes with the revelation. The question then becomes does the action change it back, or worsen? In answering that question, the movie leads us to an interesting debate. Knowing what we’ve just witnessed, would we be proud to say she were our mother?

2009 Movie Wrap-Up

This is the time of year when everyone tells you what they think are the best movies of the year. I'll do the same, tomorrow. Today, when I was about to give you my two cents on 2010, I remembered I haven't told you what I thought were the best films of '09. Here's the long and short of it (* denotes foreign language movies):

25. Moon
24. The Secret in their Eyes*
23. A Serious Man
22. The Lovely Bones
21. Sin Nombre*

20. District 9
19. World's Greatest Dad
18. Paranormal Activity
17. Broken Embraces*
16. In the Loop
15. Up in the Air
14. Good Hair
13. Brothers
12. Big Fan
11. Thirst*

10. Zombieland
9. The Hangover
8. Drag Me to Hell
7. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo*
6. The Messenger
5. Inglourious Basterds
4. Sugar
3. Up
2. Precious based on the Novel 'Push' by Sapphire
1. The Hurt Locker

On the flipside...

The Worst of 2009:

10. Underworld: Rise of the Lycans
9. Jennifer's Body
8. 2012
7. The Collector
6. Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
5. The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day
4. Alvin & the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel
3. G-Force
2. Year One
1. Miss March


Finally, way on the other side...

The Most "So Bad They're Awesome!" (no rankings, here):

Blood: The Last Vampire
Blood and Bone
Crank: High Voltage
Ninja Assassin
Obsessed
The Stepfather
The Tournament

The Girl Who Played With Fire

Directed by Daniel Alfredson.
2009. Rated R, 129 minutes, Swedish.
Cast:
Noomi Rapace
Michael Nyqvist
Lena Endre
Sofia Ledarp
Georgi Staykov
Peter Andersson
Michalis Koutsogiannakis
Hans Christian Thulin
Yasmine Garbi

After the unbelievable adventure that was The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, Lisbeth Salander (Rapace) understandably needed some time away. She took a year to do some traveling and, presumably, get a little R & R. Upon her return home, she visits some old friends and starts to take care of some unfinished business. This means going to see her probation officer and making sure he keeps up his end of the bargain they painfully came to agree upon in the first movie. However, when he turns up dead, along with a young journalist and his criminologist wife, Lisbeth becomes the top suspect in all three murders. They are all killed by the probation officer’sgun which has her fingerprints on them. Lisbeth trying to clear her name ensues.

Her biggest ally is the one friend she can’t bring herself to actually go see, Mikael Blomkvist (Nyqvist). The two worked closely together, even became lovers during the first movie. Here, he aids her from afar. Though she keeps her distance, he’s still supremely confident in her innocence.

For the genre of movie it finds itself in, it’s a very solid entry. It’s well written, moves at a brisk pace and gives us intriguing enough villains to root against. Lisbeth continues to be an amazing character, hellbent on living by her own rules. Where Fire suffers is in comparison to its predecessor. Dragon Tattoo is electrifying because it takes an unflinching look at the rawness of its characters and the situations they’re in. It leaves almost nothing to your insinuations and uses the camera’s trained eye to create empathy while resorting to normal movie manipulations as little as possible.

This time around, everything feels much more conventional. The plot machinations are more easily visible and feel culled from standardized Hollywood protocol. So too, do the revelations that pop up along the way. There’s little surprise here. In fact, at the risk of spoiling things, it’s almost like much of Star Wars lore has been adapted to this set of characters in present day Stockholm.

With all of that said, it is still a solid, if unspectacular, sequel. A good movie in its own right, it only loses points because fo the greatness of the original. I still recommend seeing it if, for no other reason than being thrust back into the world of Lisbeth Salander. It’s a dark, seedy place filled with the smoke from her constantly lit cigarette. Rapace gives another marvelous performance in the lead role. She alone is enough to keep us anxiously waiting the completion of this trilogy with The Girl Who Kicked the Hornets Nest.

MY SCORE: 7/10

Splinterheads

Directed by Barnt Sersen.
2009. Rated R, 94 minutes.
Cast:
Thomas Middleditch
Rachael Taylor
Christopher McDonald
Lea Thompson
Dean Winters
Jason Rogel
Edmund Lyndeck
Pamela Shaw
Frankie Faison
Jason Mantzoukas
Lennon Parham

Justin (Middleditch) is a bit of a loser and a lot of a slacker. He’s grown but lives at home with mom and works for his best friend as a lawn mower. When an attractive girl hustles him for sixty bucks he still takes a shine to her. Well, I did say she’s attractive, right? When she hustles him a second time at the carnival where she works, he falls flat out in love with her. Okay, having a thing for her after she gets over on you once, I can see. Twice? She just isn’t that dang hot. Oh well, such is the way with lonely boys when a real live female that’s not related to them pays them the least bit of attention, I guess.

The girl’s name is Galaxy (Taylor). In case you were wondering, that’s the first clue this is a quirky indy comedy. I think her name is supposed to symbolize the enormity of her presence in Justin’s world, or something. It really just feels like her parent did a lot of drugs.

Anyhoo, to shorten this up a bit, the carnival Galaxy works at is a traveling one, in town for a couple weeks. She has a nasty, tough guy boyfriend named Reggie (Winters) that even she doesn’t like, but is obviously scared to death of. There’s also Bruce (McDonald). He seems to be the only cop in town and is still smarting from his breakup with Justin’s mom (Thompson). Add in the horny aunt (Shaw), the terrible carny magician known as the Amazing Steve (Mantzoukas), his assistant/girlfriend Wyoming (Parham) and Justin’s bestest buddy, Wayne (Rogel) and you have the whole dag-nabbit crew. In case you were wondering, though I don’t know why you would be, Wayne is of Asian descent and his full name is Wayne Chung. Someone who is too clever by half did this so they would have an excuse to use the song Everybody Have Fun Tonight by the group Wang Chung. Whatever.

Oh, I almost forgot the best character. That would be Justin’s 116 year old grandfather Albert (Lyndeck). Through a fortunately unfortunate event, he’s just become the world’s oldest living man. His scenes are consistently among the best.

As for the rest of the movie, it tries real hard. It efforts mightily for our laughs, but rarely earns them. It never gels into a cohesive piece of work. It’s also rather cliché despite all its surface quirkiness. Even worse, since much of it takes place at the carnival, it can’t avoid comparisons to the far superior Adventureland. In fact, I suggest you see Adventureland, instead.

MY SCORE: 4.5/10