31 Days of Horror: The Shining

Thursday Movie Picks: Once Was Enough (Movies You Don't Want to Watch Again)

Against the Crowd Blogathon: The Kubrick Klassick Worse Than a Michael Bay Flick

Last week, I decided to start a blogathon in which we bloggers get to rant against the popular opinion. The rules are simple:

1. Pick one movie that "everyone" loves (the more iconic, the better). That movie must have a score of at least 80% on rottentomatoes.com. Tell us why you hate it.

2. Pick one movie that "everyone" hates (the more notorious, the better). That movie must have a score of less than 30% on rottentomatoes.com. Tell us why you love it.

3. Include the tomato meter scores of both movies.

Easy-peasy, right?

Like some have expressed, it was easy picking out a movie I hated that most people loved. I can instantly name dozens of them. My first thought was to go with the movie that inspired the idea for this blogathon, Dallas Buyers Club. It didn't quite work for me. I figured that would be lazy since I just reviewed it a couple weeks ago. Besides,  I don't actually hate it. My next thought was The Tree of Life, which I did flat out hate, but I've also reviewed that. I decided to go with the movie The Tree of Life most reminds me of...

2001: A Space Odyssey

95%

I know. It's a classic. I know. It's one of the most influential movies of all time. I know. It's a groundbreaking cinematic achievement. I know. I know all that and there is lots more you want to tell me about this movie. Yawn.

I hate this movie.

More accurately, I don't think I've ingested enough mind-altering substances to fully appreciate it. To me, it was an excruciatingly boring experience. Five minute long shots of objects floating around are snore inducing and scream pretentious to me. Sure its got great visuals but do we have to dawdle on each one, forever? Put bluntly, there is no good reason this movie is nearly two and a half hours long.

None.

I understand fully what Stanley Kubrick was trying to do with this movie. Unfortunately, it just became a self-indulgent exercise in film technique. I cannot deny that the man gave us a number of iconic shots and even a much ballyhooed finale, it just should have gotten to the point a hell of a lot quicker. I mean like 90 minutes quicker. That's approximately how much time he spends in a circle jerk with the cinematographer and the composer. Again, these are beautiful pictures. I don't stare at pictures for longer than a few seconds no matter how great they are. It only takes a couple moments to figure out that it looks like the Mona Lisa's eyes are following you. No need to keep ogling the damn thing. If these shots are limited to a reasonable amount of time, you get the same story playing out in much less time and it is unquestionably the greatest short film ever produced. As it is, it's us watching a few guys practice making a movie.

Yup, I mentioned the composer. The score is a breathtaking piece of music. When paired with objects floating hypnotically about for what seems like hours it adds to the unbearable pretentiousness of it all. The sounds emanating from the speakers seem to be screaming "Look at this, it's some important shit!" It also becomes part of the giant sleeping pill that is this movie. I'm not even joking about this. It took me several attempts to get through this as it just dragged my eyelids toward the ground. I made my last attempt only after a very long and fulfilling nap. Even this was a struggle. Try this at home: put on any piece of classical music (no offense to classical music fans), grab any picture in your house, and stare intently at it for the duration of the piece you're listening to. Zzzzzz....

zzzzzz...cmmmp cmmmp... ...Ahem...where was I?

Oh yeah, watching 2001 was a thankless chore I'll make every effort to not repeat.

On the other hand, this is a movie I have and will watch repeatedly...

Bad Boys II

 23%

Yup, it's a Michael Bay movie. It's not just any old Michael Bay movie, either. It's pretty much everything us critics hate him for all rolled up into one noisy package. Everything and then some goes boom, the humor is crass, Gabrielle Union's supposedly seasoned vet FBI agent is reduced to a beautiful, but helpless damsel in distress, and yes there are a good deal of unnecessary slow motion shots.

You know what?

It works.

I enjoy the ridiculous shoot out with the Jamaican drug dealers. I have fun watching a truck full of cars being dumped all over the freeway as our heroes chase them down. I laugh hysterically when Martin Lawrence accidentally takes some Ecstasy. For two hours and change I forget Michael Bay subjected me to Armageddon, Pearl Harbor, and far too many Transformers movies.

The biggest reason for how enjoyable I find this movie is the chemistry between our heroes: Will Smith and Martin Lawrence. It was very good and helped carry the first Bad Boys. Here, it's taken to a few notches higher. Their back and forths are plain hilarious. Their ad libbing elevates Bay's juvenile humor to rib tickling art.

Now, I have to speak about my favorite scene.

Martin Lawrence's daughter is about to go out on her first date. When the lucky young man knocks on the door, he is greeted by an angry Lawrence and a liquor swilling, gun waving Smith. They scare the poor boy to death. Damn your meditative journey through mankind, your iconic score, and the sci-fi masterpiece they created. This shit is cinematic gold. My brother and I both have daughters that just became teenagers. We've vowed to re enact this scene at each others' houses.

Call us stupid.

Fear for our daughters' love lives.

Just don't tell me 2001 is better than Bad Boys II.

The Ten Most Influential Directors of All Time

John at Hitchcock's World has been a very busy blogger, lately. Just the other day, I participated in his relay for The Ten Biggest Stars of Classical Hollywood and he's got blogathons going, left and right. I've also been handed the baton to another relay John has started. This one for The Ten Most Influential Directors of All Time. The amazing Alex at And So it Begins... did the honors.

The rules are simple, but in case you don't know them, they go like this: From a pre-existing list, remove one person and replace them with another, explaining why on both counts. Then pass the list on to another blogger.

Ready on the Set...

Action!

Making the Cut

Francis Ford Coppola

D.W. Griffith

Howard Hawks

Alfred Hitchcock

Stanley Kubrick

Sergio Leone

Georges Méliès

Steven Spielberg

Martin Scorsese

Edited Out:

David Lynch

When I think of David Lynch, I think odd, quirky, unique, and maybe misunderstood. He is a man of vision with an unmistakable style. More of his cinematic flourishes seem purely of his own imagination than probably any other director I can think of. He doesn't merely make films, he experiments with the medium. However, I don't think of him as hugely influential. When it's all said and done, he will leave us a body of work that deserves to be studied for the rest of time. I just don't think there are a line of would be auteurs trying to follow in his footsteps.

Spliced In:

Quentin Tarantino

Whether or not Tarantino is one of the greatest directors of all time is open to debate. What is not debatable is the fact that he is highly influential. He's so much so that cinematic history can be split into two sections: Before and After Pulp Fiction. Until that movie came out, QT had been gaining recognition as a force to be reckoned with, a hot new commodity. After PF hit the screen, lots and lots of movies came out aping his style. He himself transparently ripped off paid homage to movies he loved as a youth and now directors everywhere do the same. The ultra-violent crime comedy is a genre he practically invented. Characters in every genre were suddenly more self-aware and more easily identifiable as part of the same universe as us viewers. They made references to all the pop culture things we know and love. They spoke with the same kind of snark and sarcasm as many of us, with at least as many four-letter words. That's as much a testament to his ability as a writer as it is to what he does from the director's chair, but it's all part of the package. A number of directors owe him their entire careers. More importantly, he single-handedly changed the cinematic landscape.

With that, I'm passing the baton to m. brown at Two Dollar Cinema. 

The  Relay So Far...

John from Hitchcock's World

Katy from Girl Meets Cinema

Alex from And So it Begins...

Wendell from Dell on Movies

Favorite War Movies

Truth told, war movies are not my favorite genre. That said, there is nothing quite so visceral as a well done battle scene, and not much as gut-wrenching as a film that cuts to the heart of war. The simple fact of the matter is that war is, unfortunately, one of the most innately human things depicted on the screen. That said, I have to say thanks to all of my fellow vets out there. Enjoy Veteran's Day and check out one or more of my...

5 Favorite War Movies

5. Apocalypse Now

(1979)

General: Francis Ford Coppola

Conflict: The Vietnam War

This is Francis Ford Coppola at a time when he could seemingly do no wrong. We follow Benjamin L. Willard, played by an amazing Martin Sheen, go on a manhunt for one of the United States' own, Col. Walter E. Kurtz. Apparently, Kurtz has gone crazy and needs to be eliminated. Marlon Brando delivers the goods as the nutso colonel. The rest of the cast also turns in stellar work. Included are Harrison Ford, Robert Duvall, and a pubescent Laurence Fishburne. They help deliver Coppola's anti-war vision to the screen. This is arguably the best movie ever made about Vietnam.

4. Glory

(1989)

General: Edward Zwick

Conflict: The Civil War

An oft-neglected component of American history, both educational and cinematic, is the contribution of black soldiers to the efforts of the Union Army during the Civil War. More than any other, Glory is the film that drives home the point that African Americans were not merely spectators in the decisive battle over the legality of slavery. Cpt. Shaw (Matthew Broderick) is tasked with heading up an all black company. They are given only menial task which gives us ample time to get to know them. Boy, do we ever, thanks to stellar work from Denzel Washington, Morgan Freeman, and Andre Braugher (making his big screen debut), among others.

3. Schindler's List

(1993)

General: Steven Spielberg

Conflict: World War II

Schindler's List is different from most war movies in that the focus is not on the people actively fighting. Here, our protagonist is Oskar Schindler (Liam Neeson). He's a German businessman who is a member of the Nazi party. However, his life becomes saving Jews from persecution and execution while maintaining the appearance of loyalty to the Nazi's. It's an epic in every sense of the word. This includes its villain, Amon Goeth, played by Ralph Fiennes being as unlikable as is humanly possible.

2. Full Metal Jacket

(1987)

General: Stanley Kubrick

Conflict: The Vietnam War

Let's just get this out of the way, now. The opening half of Full Metal Jacket is the best depiction of boot camp ever committed to film, period. What R. Lee Ermey does as Gunnery Sergeant Hartman is nothing short of perfect. The same goes for Vincent D'Onofrio as Private "Pyle". I've seen both men in many things since but whenever I do, this movie immediately comes to mind. The second half, which includes neither, has been so overshadowed, people seem to forget it even exists. I'm not here to tell you it's just as good as the first half, but I will say that is excellent in its own right.

1. Saving Private Ryan

(1998)

General: Steven Spielberg

Conflict: World War II

What Saving Private Ryan does better than perhaps any movie not made during the silent film era is tell its story through action. Sure there's plenty of exposition in the name of character development, but it's the battle scenes that not only thrill us, they tell us what's going on. Of course, what's going on is the seemingly impossible extraction of one soldier, Private Ryan (Matt Damon) from the front lines of World War II after it is learned that his three brothers have all been killed. Damon is good, but as his commanding officer, Tom Hanks is great. It's some of his best work, in my opinion. The rest of the cast is also great and too numerous to name. And yes, the Omaha Beach scene that opens the movie is the most tense battle scene of them all.


Some other great war movies (chronologically)...

Paths of Glory (1957)
The Battle of Algiers (1966)
Patton (1970)
Das Boot (1981)
A Soldier's Story (1984)
Platoon (1986)
Flags of Our Fathers/Letters from Iwo Jima (2006)
The Hurt Locker (2008)
Zero Dark Thirty (2012)

The Killing

Directed by Stanley Kubrick.
1956. Not Rated, 89 minutes.
Cast:
Sterling Hayden
Elisha Cook Jr.
Marie Windsor
Vince Edwards
Ted de Corsia
Jay C. Flippen
Joe Sawyer
Colleen Gray

Fresh out of prison after a five year bid, Johnny (Hayden) very quickly tries to bring a master plan together. He and a couple guys who work there are going to rob the local racetrack right when its at its busiest. Also involved are a dirty cop and a couple random thugs Johnny from his time on the inside.

Aside from Johnny and the two hoods, the others aren’t really crooks but have been driven into criminal behavior by circumstance. The cop is in deep to a bookie and another guy has a sickly wife he desperately wants to take care of. The last guy, George (Cook Jr) is the one we focus on most. He’s married to Sherry (Windsor), a woman out of his league. He earned her hand based on the promise he was going to strike it rich. Five years later, her every word to him is a reminder he hasn’t and she can’t stand it any longer. He correctly suspects her of having an affair but lacks the spine to call her on it. Instead, he merely pleads with her not to “do anything stupid” while he’s out meeting with the boys. He also does something else that proves to be detrimental to the heist, but I’ve already said too much.

Written and directed by the legendary Stanley Kubrick, The Killing is a fascinating, yet rigid heist movie. The crime and the various subplots unfold nicely. The whole thing comes to a head with a “wow” ending. The rigidity comes from the fact that it’s shoe-horned into an hour and a half. Honestly, there could be an hour more to this movie. Instead of being shown everything, half the movie is read to us off the page by a narrator. He’s not exactly reciting beautiful poetry, either. We’re talking stodgy prose of the “At 3:32 PM, Johnny arrived at the hotel” variety.

Its flaws are the reason this is a movie I could actually like to see remade. The story is already excellent, yet there is much room for growth. The characters could be given more room to flourish and/or fail. As it is, it works fine. It’s even better than fine and hailed by some as a classic. I’m greedy. I want more.

MY SCORE: 7.5/10